Forgotten
by Riza Winters
Summary: Toshiro and Kenpachi have been roaming the Soul Society for years, going wherever they can find a good fight, but when when they are found by Soul Reapers and told they must return home, everything changes.
1. Chapter 1

"Hey kid!"

The white haired boy paused in his saunter. He looked over her shoulder, lazily chewing on a piece of bread, unconcerned by the mob if thugs that confronted him.

"Hey brat we're talking to you!" Their leader stood out before them, a towering figure with a bulging belly and fat fists. "Give us that bread and you won't get hurt."

The boy slowly swallowed the piece of bread in his mouth and turned around, revealing the armful of loaves he held against his chest. He smiled.

"Trust me, you don't need it." He scoffed, eyeing the leader's belly.

"Little brat!" he screamed, running forward. The boy dodged with ease, tripping up the thug on his way by. He crashed into the dirt face first.

"Bastard!" cried another thug and the whole mob came charging. The boy calmly set down the pile of loaves and took his stance. The mob was charging, screaming. The boy's smile grew.

"Need some help?" The mob stopped in its tracks. The boy dropped his fists and turned around to face the monstrously oversized man behind him. He glared.

"What are you doing here, Kenpachi? This is my fight."

"Hmm...twenty guys, that's quite a bit, even for you, Toshiro."

"I can handle it."

"Maybe, but I was bored."

"Fine." The boy sighed and turned back to the mob. While they'd been arguing, the leader had gotten back to his feet and the men had formed a circle around the two. Toshiro moved behind Kenpachi and stood back to back, raising his fists again. The men charged.

The brawl drew a few brave spectators to the edge of the woods where the mob attacked the two dramatically opposed figures. Both were dressed in plain black robes but that was where the similarities ended. The small one had brilliant white hair, short and spiky. He moved at a wicked speed, jumping here and there, blocking every attack and knocking back foes despite his size. At his back was a towering man of muscles, his hair hung long and black. His blows were immensely powerful and he never broke stance. In a matter of minutes it was over, the two completely uninjured at the centre of a sea of unconscious bodies. The small one picked up the loaves and they disappeared into the forest.

"I could have handled it." Toshiro repeated, handing his partner a loaf of bread as they walked through the trees.

"Shut up." They walked in contented silence. Eventually the trees gave way to a small glade, practically untouched and far from any village. Toshiro threw himself down on the bank next to the current of water that streamed out of a low cave.

"You're tired aren't you?" Kenpachi said sitting down as well.

"No. I'm just hungry. You are too." he protested, eating more bread.

"Its getting worse. You nearly froze the whole cave last night."

"What do you want me to do?"

"Easy kid, I'm not trying to pick a fight."

"Whatever." They returned to their meal. "But, the hunger, its been getting worse." Toshiro said after a bit.

"Hmmm." Kenpachi consented.

"What does it mean?"

"I have no idea."

They both sighed.

"Where to next, Ken?"

The big man scratched his neck and stared at the fading sun.

"That way. We've been going in too much of a straight line lately, could be missing some interesting fights in the West."

The boy smiled that blood lust smile the two shared. He finished the bread he had in his hands and stretched out.

"Sleeping out here tonight?"

"Don't want you catching a cold now do I?"

"Pft, as if." the sun disappeared, Kenpachi stretched and strolled into the cave. He plunked himself in the corner where he and Toshiro kept their few belongings. Alone, he picked up the white bundle he used as a pillow and unfolded it. In large black print the number eleven stared back at him. He gazed at it for a long time in the near dark until the obscurity became to deep for him to see it any more. He folded it back up and lay down.

* * *

The band of thugs trudged through the black woods, hoping they were moving in the right direction. An easily intimidated spectator had pointed them in the direction of the two warriror and now they would get their revenge. This time, they brought back-up.

They came to the edge of the woods where there was a small clearing. They crouched and took everything in. The banks shone brilliantly in the moonlight, pure white powder covered them and laying among it was the boy, deep asleep as flakes gently drifted all around him.

"Is that snow?"

"No way, not this time of year."

"But its freezing."

"I know but–"

"Shut it." It was the leader. "We move now. That cave there, I'm betting that's where the other one is. First we get the kid, then we all take the other one down." Everyone nodded and they moved out, treading lightly in the snow.

The leader pulled a long, thin dagger from his side and inched his way to the boy. He was deep in sleep, his body twitching with some dream and he faintly whispered a name,.

"Hyorinmaru...."

Then the steel was against his skin. His eyes popped open in the same instant that the massive figure of Kenpachi appeared from the cave entrance.

"Freeze." The leader said, applying pressure to the blade against the boy's neck while he positioned himself astride his small body, pinning the boy's arms under his knees. There was no cry of pain, only pure hatred stared back at him.

"You dropped your guard, kid." the big man said nonchalantly.

"Shut up, Ken."

The thug dug the blade deeper, silencing the child and soaking his neck with blood.

"I'll give ya one chance to leave." The unarmed man said, leaning into the rock wall of the cave.

"No way. I've got a score to settle with you."

The leader nodded and his men attacked. The man laughed as he dove into their midst, fists swinging wildly. Many of the men fell almost immediately. But one held his ground, a long sword raised. He drove it forward with all his strength and struck the beast. The leader laughed where he sat astride the boy, who's body tensed beneath him.

"Its all over now." he drawled. But as they watched the man who struck stepped back in terror. His sword was dry, and Kenpachi uninjured. He looked just as perplexed as his attacker, but a wicked grin spread across his face and he laughed manically. He dispensed with the rest of the men then made his way to the leader who was now trembling with fear. The blade in his hand shook violently against the boy's throat, causing more blood to flow.

"Should have taken your chance when you had it." Kenpachi said.

"I'll do it." said the leader, yanking Toshiro off the ground and using him as a shield as he backed up to the woods. Kenpachi saw how much blood soaked the boy's robes, his eyes were only half open now. He paused.

"Very good. Now don't follow us and I'll let him go when I'm safe." The man said, backing into the shadow of the woods. His face disappeared in darkness, but Toshiro's was still lit up by the moonlight. His eyes went wide and he screamed,

"Kenpachi, look out!" There had been more men waiting in the woods. The second wave struck and this time some of their blades succeeded in making deep wounds in the huge man. His movements were slower– whatever had happened before that had protected him from the swords seemed to have tired him out and worn off.

"Damn you." Toshiro stomped down on the leader's foot. He yelled and his grasp faltered just long enough for the boy to wriggled away. Toshiro turned and kicked the leader hard in the stomach, then again in the head. Not waiting to check that he was definitely out, he turned to the group attacking Kenpachi. Raw anger welled up inside him and he felt a strange tingling in all of his body. A moment ago he could hardly see for loss of blood but now the world was clear, the movements of the enemy slow. He felt heat in his palms, a blue ball of energy was forming. He didn't understand– couldn't– but in that moment he didn't care. He raised his hands before him and bellowed,

"Kenpachi! Get down!!!" The man dropped without question. Toshiro released the energy inside him and watched it envelop the thugs. They screamed for but a second before there was silence.

Kenpachi rose and stepped over the corpses to the boy.

"Kid?" Toshiro swayed on his feet, tried to look up at the giant but dizziness overtook him and he was on the ground, the moon spinning in the sky before it was blocked out by that scarred face. Then it faded to nothing.

* * *

"Renji!" The red haired captain looked up to see his leuitenant out of breath in the door way, her chest heaving.

"Rangiku, what is it?" He was used to her not calling him captain, out of respect for the one she'd lost. He couldn't even bring himself to say that it was _Captain _Abarai, remembering how often Hitsugaya had had to say the same thing to Ichigo and Momo.

"Its him, I felt it."

His pen froze over his paperwork. He stood.

"You felt it too, didn't you?" She nearly begged.

"There was a disturbance, but Rangiku, after all this time– "

"They found Captain Kurotsuchi!" She argued.

"Yeah, after a few months. Is been _ten years _Rangiku, I thought we'd put him to rest."

"It was him, I know that spiritual pressure anywhere."

"She's right." The voice came from the window causing both Rangiku and Renji to jump.

"Yachiru." the small girl gazed at them sombrely. In the past ten years she'd aged only slightly, just an inch or two taller. But her hair had grown long, her eyes were sad and serious and she looked much older than she was.

"I felt Kenny too. They're together. I will find them."

"Yachiru, you looked for so long..." Renji began.

"It was him. It was my Kenny, I know it, and I'll find him. Then the two of us will kill Aizen together." Her hand was on her sword hilt and she crouched, ready to flash step away.

"Wait!" Rangiku cried.

"What?"

"I'm coming with you." She grabbed her zampakuto and strapped it around her waist.

"Rangiku."

"Sorry _captain_, but I won't abandon him."

Ragiku went to the window and the two girls looked about to leap but then both stopped.

"What is it?" Renji asked. Both women turned to him with shock in their eyes. "Its gone." Rangiku said, barely above a whisper. "Captain Hitsugaya and Capatain Zaraki's spiritual pressure is completely gone."


	2. Chapter 2

Toshiro woke. It was evening. _Had he been asleep an entire day?_ He rolled over and sat up. His neck pained him greatly. Dried blood crusted the front of his robes and chafed his skin. He raised a hand to the spot where the dagger had cut into him but it was bandaged.

"Ken?" He whispered hoarsely. His whole body trembled with weakness. Then he noticed the body beside him. Kenpachi was sprawled in the melting snow, snoring loudly.

"Kenpachi." Toshiro shook his shoulder. Nothing. He tried again and this time the giant stirred. He remembered what had happened and sat up straight.

"Ken, what happened?"

"I passed out." His hands were shaking too. "What the hell did you do?"

"I don't know. What the hell did _you_ do?" He pointed to Kenpachi's chest.

"I don't know."

They both sighed. Kenpachi found the rest of their bread and split it with Toshiro. They both began to feel better with the sustenance.

"Is this snow?" Kenpachi said after a while, scooping up the last little clumping of it in his hand.

"I guess so. Good thing I slept outside, you might have frozen."

"Good thing, are you kidding me? You nearly got yourself killed being so careless. Since when could anyone ever sneak up on you?" The boy's eyes fell to the ground and he absently rubbed his sore neck.

"I was dreaming."

"Pft."

"I keep having the same dream, about this dragon made of ice."

"You got into the sake didn't you?"

"Yeah right that stuff is disgusting."

"So this ice dragon...what do you think it means?"

Toshiro looked up at his companion. His tone of voice caught his attention. "What is it? Are you having weird dreams too?"

The big man looked down at the boy, his face strange. "I can never see anything..." he began. "Its just dark, but there's this sort of... presence."

"What's happening to us?" The boy said looking down at his hands.

"I don't know. But its time for us to move on." Kenpachi said rising to his feet and surveying the bodies around him. "Man, whatever you did, it sure was powerful." He mumbled getting a whiff of the charred corpses.

"Yeah." Toshiro stood as well, but his skin was still deathly pale and what little blood he had left rushed to his head. He fell forward and Kenpachi caught him by the front of his robes just before he hit the ground.

"Maybe I should have mentioned you nearly bled to death before I got that tourniquet around your neck."

"Maybe." Toshiro whispered before he went completely limp. Kenpachi hoisted him to one shoulder, grabbed their things, and marched away over the corpses.

* * *

"Hey baldy." Ikkaku looked up at his young lieutenant. She hardly filled the roll, Yumichika did all her paperwork, but he couldn't bring himself to depose her after Zaraki had gone. He did however, get tired of her lack of respect.

"Its _captain_ _Madrame _to you."

"He's back." She waited for the reaction but it didn't come. "Kenny, I felt his spiritual pressure, you need to get the squad ready for when we feel it again. We might not have much time to find him."

"Yachiru–"

"I know it was him!"

"Yachiru!" His face softened slightly. "I know it was too. Where do you think the whole squad's gone?"

She stopped short. The girl raced to the window and saw no signs of life in the yard or the barracks. She turned around with a smile.

"Oh pinhead, you're the best."

He ignored her.

"I'm waiting until I feel another spike. What about you?"

The girl considered. "Hmmm, I could, but I think I'll head out now, it was pretty far away, like the other side of the world away."

"I know. That must be why we didn't sense him before."

"Hmm, I guess, but I went over the whole soul society and I never felt him."

"True."

"Well, I'm going."

"I'll see you when we find him then." She flashed him a smile and his killer's heart warmed a little. It had been years since anyone had seen her smile. Then, in a flash of pink, she was gone.


	3. Chapter 3

Toshiro sat on a high stool while an elderly woman puttered around her shop searching for he right herbs to mix. They had come to a village after several days of walking and still the gash in Toshiro's neck hadn't gotten much better. It was itchy and he couldn't seem to stop scratching it.

"Here you go dear." She returned to him with a cloth dampened in a brownish liquid. She tilted his head back and dabbed the ointment on his wound. It felt cool and relieving.

"Thank you." he sighed. She rebandaged his neck and bottled some ointment for him to take with him. He paid her and left.

He and Kenpachi had gotten a fair bit of cash out of the bodies they'd left behind. They seldom had money for anything but now they spent some time in the village to spend a little of their hard earned cash. It was a very busy place. It seemed the farther west they went the more people there were. He looked around but could not see his friend. Frustrated, he moved to ally and shut his eyes.

There.

In all the years they'd been together, he'd always had the uncanny ability of sensing out his friend. After what had happened recently, however, he couldn't help but wonder if with was more than intuition. He marched through the streets with purpose, following after that familiar presence. Then it changed. He felt a sort of spike in energy coming from Kenpachi. His pace quickened.

* * *

Kenpachi downed another glass of sake at the bar. He slammed down another coin and was quickly served. He surveyed the occupants, looking to see if there were any good fights to be found. He might as well entertain himself while the kid got patched up.

"Hey, what are soul reapers doing out here?" Kenpachi looked up as the barman yelled across the room. The whole tavern fell silent. Two men in black kimono's and carrying katana's walked in.

"Soul reaper? What's that?" Kenpachi asked.

"Are you serious?" a nearby patron responded to him. "They rule the Soul Society. They live in the sereiti in the West."

"Hmmm, never heard of them."

"You must be from far away then."

"Mmm."

The men in black kimonos plowed their way through the crowd. Kenpachi sat casually in his seat while they made their way directly to him. All he thought was, these guys might be good to fight.

"Captain Zaraki!" They cried when they finally stood before him. He didn't know how to react.

"Who?"

Their faces fell.

"Its us, from squad eleven, Ikkaku sent us to find you. And Yachiru's been looking for you forever."

"Listen boys, I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Please, sir, you have to come with us. I'm sure they'll be able to help you remember when you get back to the sereitei."

"I'm not going any where with you."

He stood menacingly. The two braced themselves.

"We can't leave you here. Please just come with us."

"No." He could feel that swelling of energy inside him again. The people around him fell back.

He didn't understand. He didn't understand any of it, and it bothered him– much more than it should have.

"Leave now." He commanded.

"Sorry, sir."

"Oh you will be."

The tavern exploded in energy. Kido spells flew here and there, fists, swords– chaos enveloped the whole area. More soul reapers were drawn by the release of power. For once, Kenpachi was out numbered, faced by this strange group with incredible power.

The soul reapers formed a line. They had their hands raised to form one, united restraining kido. Kenpachi didn't know what they were about to do, but he was sure it wasn't good.

"Need some help?" He felt the gentle weight of Toshiro landing on his shoulder as he sometime did when he got tired of shouting up at Kenpachi to talk to him. This time there were no words, though, he just stood on the giant's shoulders, and raised his hands. The blue light formed and it blasted forth.

The soul reapers dodged.

"Oh yeah." Kenpachi said looking up at his small comrade, "forgot to mention, they can do that too, and they can do it better."

Toshiro balked. He was already drained from that much expenditure of energy.

"Then what do we do?" He asked crouching lower to Kenpachi's ear.

"Captain Hitsugaya!" someone yelled. Toshiro felt his heart flip. It was not his name, but when they said it, he turned to face them instinctively. Kenpachi looked up at him startled.

"You know that name?"

"I don't know...."

"You are the captain of squad ten." one of them explained. "Please come with us. We can help you remember."

"Remember? We haven't forgotten anything." he said, suddenly angry.

"Sir, please..."

"Let's get out of here Kenpachi."

"Agreed." They both leapt into the middle of the soul reapers without warning, causing as much chaos as possible before darting away at top speed.

"I hate to run from a fight. " Kenpachi said when they'd put some distance between themselves and the soul reapers.

"Me too." Toshiro panted beside him. They came to a halt well outside the village.

"Who were they?"

"Soul reapers."

"What's that?"

"I don't know."

The two sat down near a stream and drank some water. Kenpachi lay down their pack. Both he and Toshiro eyed it for several seconds before they each reached for it. Kenpachi tore it open and pulled out the white hioris.

"Those black kimonos we had on when we woke up here, they looked like the soul reapers'."

"I don't really remember." Toshiro said.

"You were young."

"Was not!"

"You were."

"Shut up." The big man shrugged and tossed Toshiro the smaller white bundle. He unfurled it and traced the numbers.

"How did they know about these?" He asked but Kenpachi was lost in thought. They were both wondering the same thing. Finally, Toshiro said it out loud.

"Whaterver these soul reapers are, they seem to have power, like us. I could feel their presence like I can you."

"You and your feelings." the other scoffed.

"Hey, they've never been wrong. Plus, I think it has something to do with that blue energy thing I did."

"Hmmm."

"What do you think?"

"I think these soul reaper people are crazy and you're letting them get to you. We died, we came to the soul society, end of story."

"I know, but it was kind of weird how they knew the numbers that were on the clothes we were wearing when we came here."

"Just a coincidence."

Toshiro fell silent. He rolled the hiori back up and put it under his head.

"What are you doing?"

"Going to sleep."

"It's the middle of the day."

"Mmm, I'm tired."

"Geeze, that kido stuff takes a lot out of you."

"Kido?"

"Yeah, that's what they called it."

"Oh." he was curious to know more but tiredness was overtaking him. He fell asleep listening to the lulling brook.

* * *

"_Toshiro Hitsugaya!" The ice dragon roared, clear in his mind. "Have you forgotten me? I have been waiting for you all this time."_

"_Who are you?"_

"_I am Hyorinmaru. Find me!"_

The world of ice shattered and Toshiro woke with a start. It was night. Frost crunched beneath his hands as he pushed himself to his feet.

"Ken!" He shouted. "Kenpachi!" there was nothing. The man was gone, he was alone.

He felt out for his presence, there, not far, just a half a mile. He stumbled in the dark. His mind was racing. _Hitsugaya._ Was that really his name or had he just been influenced by the day's events? It disturbed him.

"Kenpachi!" He nearly ran into the mammoth of a man. He was standing stark still. "Ken, what is it?"

He looked past his friend who didn't answer and saw a small figure. She was also dressed like the soul reapers, but her hair was bright pink, even in the moonlight. Her face was anguished.

"How can you not remember me, Kenny? After all these years I searched for you! You know my name. You named me! Yachiru! Yachiru! Yachiru!" She screamed hysterically, never paying attention to Toshiro. The boy looked back to his friend and saw his body was held tight by some invisible force.

"What did you do to him?" He cried.

The girl stopped screaming and looked at him. Her hands shifted and she began an incantation but he dodged.

"Why won't you soul reapers leave us alone?" he yelled, running toward her. She disappeared before his eyes. "Where...?" a stunning blow hit him from behind. He fell gasping for air. She marched toward him. Enraged he leapt back up and charged again. Again she knocked him down.

He swore in frustration and pushed himself to his feet. She disappeared before he could even make his move but this time he was ready. He countered her blow and struck back. She stumbled back a few paces, her eyes narrowed. She flash stepped again but this time, without thinking, Toshiro pushed off from the ground and suddenly he was colliding with her at colossal force. Neither could doge and they met mid air, both crashing to the ground in pain. She landed stunned and the kido barrier on Kenpachi dropped. Toshiro felt a painful crack in his ribs and struggled to get up.

"What happened?" he moaned.

"You moved like she did."

"I did?" Kenpachi just nodded, hauling the boy to his feet by the back of his collar. He staggered.

"Beat up by a girl huh?" He said, lifting him to his shoulder. But the amusement in his voice faded as he stared at her. He felt compelled to check that she was okay and very carefully, put a hand against her throat. Her pulse was even, her breath strong. Toshiro watched but said nothing. Her eyes peeled open a bit and she whispered,

"Kenny" then they shut again and she passed out. Kenpachi stood and began to run, long and hard, far away from the girl who caused his heart to pain inside his chest.


	4. Chapter 4

"Damn it!" Toshiro swore, his arms lifted above his head while Kenpachi wrapped bandages around his cracked ribs.

"You wimp!"

"Its not my fault you operate on maximum strength all the time."

"No point in not giving it your all."

"Not when you're crushing the breath out of me!"

"Shut up." he tied off the bandage and Toshiro dropped his arms.

"Geez, you're a real mess." Kenpachi criticized. He nodded, indicating the bandage around Toshiro's throat. "Better change that too."

Toshiro raised a hand to his neck. The bandage was damp.

"No way, this should be healed already."

"Must have reopened it when you were dancing around with that girl."

Toshiro ignored the insult and tore off the bandage. He took a clean one from their pack and daubed ointment onto it before he wrapped it back on.

"Make sure its tight, its bleeding pretty good again."

"Well if I make it tight to your standards I'd be strangled."

"At least you wouldn't bleed to death."

"Yeah." Toshiro laughed and finished. He stretched out on the ground under the hot sun.

"I wish I could make some snow now." he muttered

"What's with that anyway?" Kenpachi said laying down as well.

"I don't know, but it has something to do with the dragon. He called me Hitsugauya."

"You were dreaming."

"I know, but it sounded familiar. His name is Hyorinmaru. That's sounds familiar too." Kenpachi said nothing. "You looked like you knew that girl. But that's impossible."

Kenpachi sighed. "She had this look. It was creepy, she really believed she knew me. But there's no way."

"No way."

"Still...she seemed..."

"Familiar."

"Yeah. Like your dragon I guess. The whole world is going crazy."

"What happened to just finding a straightforward fight?" Toshiro sighed.

"Tell me about it."

The two lapsed into silence, comfortable, familiar. It had just been them, two against the world for ten years. They'd woken in their black and white uniforms in the soul society, their previous lives erased. People told them it was common not to remember anything, especially if their death was particularly traumatic. They'd stayed together. Something about those numbers haunted them, told them they were allies. They'd travelled almost the whole world together, picking fights whenever they could to satisfy their boredom. Ten years they searched, unknowingly, for the Seireitei. It called to them, they followed, never realizing their true destiny.

"Captain Hitsugaya." The voice came out of no where but he felt her presence as soon as she appeared. He sat up wincing in pain, unprepared for battle, half naked and half asleep. But Kenpachi was always ready. He jumped to his feet in an instant. He faced a beautiful woman. Her uniform did little to conceal her exceptional figure; her face was taught with emotion, framed by long red locks.

"Who are you?"

"Captain Zaraki," she said, barely able to tear her eyes from Toshiro. "Its me, Rangiku Matusmoto. Please, you both need to come with me."

"Everyone keeps saying that but we're not going anywhere."

"Captain Hitsugaya." she said again, looking to the boy on the ground. He was fixated with her, too engrossed to stand. _Who was she?_

"Toshiro, snap out of it!" the big man roared. The boy stood up but could not look away. "Get your hormones in check kid!"

"You're...." She looked expectantly at him but he couldn't finish. "Who are you?"

"I'm you're lieutenant, from squad ten. Don't you remember?"

"No. Impossible."

"No, please, Aizen did something to you. He took Hyorinmaru– "

"How do you know that name?!"

"He is your zampakuto! Hyorinmaru, the dragon of ice and water. I know you know him, I feel your spiritual pressure at night. He's calling out to you, even from Hueco Mundo."

"Hueco Mundo...?"

"She's trying to trick you kid, smarten up."

"Wait...I want to hear more."

Rangiku smiled warmly. "We'll get him back and then you'll remember."

"But how can I know you. Kenpachi doesn't know you."

"So?"

"So, its always just been the two of us, forever. If I had met you before, he would know."

"Captain Zaraki? Don't you remember anything?" Rangiku pleaded to the big man.

"Sister, I ain't interested in your fantasy world. You soul reapers better leave us alone or we'll take you down."

"No please, just come and it will all make sense, I'm sure of it."

"No, now get out of here."

She stood her ground. Kenpachi advanced.

"Wait!" Toshiro ran forward and grabbed his friend's wrist. "Let's just go, okay?"

"Kid, what is it? Don't let them confuse you."

"Its just–" But Kenpachi swung a fist through the air without warning. Rangiku dropped like a stone, her mouth trickling blood.

"What the hell did you do that for?" Toshiro demanded, kneeling at her side. She was unconscious.

"She was getting to you. We need to leave now." Toshiro rose reluctantly. Kenpachi was already thrusting his belongings into his hands. "Lets go, now!" He looked back the prone figure on the ground and then followed his friend. He was angry and confused, but trotted after him, knowing that no matter what, they had to stick together.


	5. Chapter 5

Two weeks had passed since they'd last encountered a soul reaper. But in those two weeks Toshiro's dreams had gotten much worse, waking him several times a night, most of the time soaked by snow. The name Hitsugaya rolled over in his head and sometimes he looked at Kenpachi and wanted to call him Zaraki. He felt the ice dragon even in his waking hours, calling to him ceaselessly, across some invisible void, in pain, alone, desperate. Kenpachi suffered too but said nothing. Toshiro felt the instability of his "spiritual pressure" as the woman had called it. But they were determined to escape it all, keep running until the world looked normal again.

"We could just fight them all." Toshiro said one night. "It would make for some entertainment."

"I suppose you're right." Kenpachi said chewing on some timothy. "But then it would all be over too quickly. This way, we get to spread out the fun, one by one."

"Hmm, good point."

But despite their cavalier words, their situation was serious. They knew the home of the soul reapers lay in the west, and it seemed no matter where they went now, they could find them, so maybe it was time to do some recon. They would continue west, where more and more people new of soul reapers and their powers, and maybe get a glimpse of this Seireitei place.

They made their usual hasty camp and Kenpachi left to get some food while Toshiro started the fire. His friend returned almost as soon as he got the flames going. In his arms he had a bundle of food and two long objects wrapped in cloth. He threw them down and their was no mistaking what they were.

"Where did you get those?"

"I relieved a couple thugs of them."

"But I thought we decided swords were no good. The fight ends too quickly that way."

"Look at yourself kid, there's something wrong with you. Your ribs are still cracked and your neck keeps reopening– you ain't healing so what will you do if you get more injuries huh? We use swords until this whole soul reaper thing is over."

Toshiro sighed. He put his hand against his neck and felt the dampness on the bandage.

"Dammit. I don't get it." He said getting a dry cloth to wrap around.

"I don't either but until you start healing like normal you better be careful."

"Fine." He munched on the food Kenpachi brought then lay down. His eyes began to close, but he could still see Kenpachi's solid figure, sitting with one arm draped over a knee, the flames illuminating those dark eyes and that rigid scar that ran the length of one side of his face.

* * *

_This time there was no ice dragon. There was a well lit, cozy room. He was at a desk, piled with papers, and on the couch was the woman, Rangiku. She was asleep and he felt annoyed. But then he gazed at her a little longer and he felt love for her, a friendship that had survived many battles. She woke and he turned back to his papers before she caught him looking at her. A black butterfly fluttered into the room. It landed on her finger, her eyes lit up with concern and she was on her feet in an instant. _

"_Captain, we've been called to face an enemy." They ran out of the room. He was moving at incredible speed, the world flashed past him, nothing but coloured blurs. Then they were at the edge of a giant gate. There was a monster, people were calling it a _Hollow_, and another soul reaper was fighting it. He had his hair spiked up, was wearing an eyepatch but even from this distance he knew it was Kenpachil. _

_Kenpachi Zaraki. _

_The white robe with the number eleven on it was stained with black blood of the hollow. But the enemy was huge, and even fore this man it was difficult. _

"_Stay back Rangiku." his lieutenant nodded and took a few steps back. He pulled the sword from his back and cried, "Bankai!" And amazing rush of energy hit him. Ice furled around his limbs and the dragon shot from the end of his blade. He was in the air, flying, baring down on the monster, roaring at Kenpachi to get out of the way. The big man had no choice, he was struck and fell back. The ice hit and the beast froze. A moment later, it shattered into nothingness._

"_Awww, its all over," said a small, pink haired girl who came out of no where and helped Kenpachi to his feet._

"_Maybe its time you talked to you zampakuto, Zaraki." Toshiro said smugly, sheathing his sword._

"_Shut up. Next time don't interfere in my fight." Toshiro didn't bother responding. He walked away followed by his lieutenant, Zaraki cursing behind him._

* * *

"Zaraki!" Toshiro sat up sharply. He felt the pain of his broken ribs. The ground was frosted beneath him but he was cover in sweat. Across the pit of glowing embers, Kenpachi awoke, his hand already reaching for his sword. The sky was pale, dawn was close. Kenpachi looked across the fire pit to his companion who was breathing heavily.

"What is it Kid?"

"I saw us. I saw us with the numbers on our backs, and swords, and I called you Zaraki."

"Woah, you were just dreaming."

"But it was so real." he fell silent, going over every detail in his head. Zaraki kicked dirt over the rest of the embers and rolled his things together.

"Come on, since we're up, we might as well get moving." the boy said nothing but followed obediently, clutching the white robe in his arms.

* * *

"What is that?" The two had come to one of the most crowded areas they'd ever been to. It was really a series of communities but no space in between them, hardly any trees or private spaces, it was claustrophobic. The inhabitants called it the Rukon district. And at the far edge was a massive wall, and beyond that a great hill.

"Hey, you." Toshiro grabbed the arm of a young girl as she passed by. "What is that place?"

"What, you mean you don't know? That's the seireitei, where the soul reapers live."

"Oh." she walked away and he exchanged looks with Kenpachi. "What do you think?"

"I think you go see what you can find out from the local kids and I'll hit up a few taverns."

"Fine. I'll find you in a couple hours." Toshiro walked away and Kenpachi lost sight of him in the crowd almost immediately. So many bodies, so close together, it was disgusting.

He made his way into a buzzing tavern and slammed down some coin for a drink. He waited. His eyes scanned the crowd, looking for the right person to ask. There. A group of young men came in, rowdy, mouthing off about how sweet soul reapers had it. Kenpachi decided to try a subtle rout, threats would come later if necessary. They needed to play it cool.

"You guys look like you could use some sake." he said, dropping more coins on the counter and nodding to the barman to serve them. The men sat next to him and thanked him. It didn't take long until he had them explaining everything they knew about soul reapers.

"How long you been here?" One asked.

"Ten years, but a lot farther away where we don't hear anything about soul reapers."

"Oh, well ten years ago is when it happened."

"What?"

'The soul reapers were almost wiped out. The captains I was telling you about were taken. There was a battle in another dimension and not all of them came back."

"Really?"

"Yeah, this guy, Aizen– ". Kenpachi stood. He heard the commotion outside and knew instantly what was happening. The temperature in the tavern dropped several degrees.

* * *

"Hi." Toshiro said approaching a small group of kids and adopting a more child like tone. "Can I play?" They turned and looked at him.

"No way." they walked away. He kicked the dirt angrily. This always happened.

"Stupid kids." he muttered.

"The sword probably doesn't help." the woman's voice startled him and he whipped around. It was her, Rangiku Matsumoto. He reached for the hilt at his back but didn't pull it out yet. Her face was gentle but then her eyes alighted on his neck.

"You had that wound when I saw you last. I know why it isn't healing."

"I have to go." he said awkwardly. The images from his dream were still vivid in his mind, he knew he wouldn't be able to face her with his usual clear mindedness.

"There's a reason you came here."

"Yeah, to get answers, but not from you."

He flash stepped away. He'd done it a few times since that night, practising on Kenpachi, scaring him when he appeared out of no where. Now he reached out for the spiritual connection and flash stepped to the tavern.

He didn't make it that far.

Someone else met him at top speed. Like before, he didn't know how to control it and couldn't dodge. The other person was ready, grabbed him mid air and they crashed to earth.

"Toshiro Hitsugaya." It was a woman, small, dark haired with even darker eyes and she was wearing the same kind of white robe that he and Kenpachi had. She had him pinned against the earth.

"What do you want?" He hissed, the pressure on his ribs was excruciating.

"So you really don't remember."

"No!" He screamed and he felt a rush of cold. He pushed her away and felt some of the cold transfer to her in the motion. She yelped and leapt back, looking down at a bit of frost bitten skin on her hand. Toshiro was startled, she saw it in his face.

"You have this power, even without your zampakuto? Some part of you must remember."

He just shook his head, speechless.

"You are Captain Hitsugaya." She said. She didn't plead with him to understand like Rangiku had done, she just stated it as simple fact.

"Who are you?"

"Soifon, captain of squad two,"

"And that white robe you have?"

"My hiori, it's the uniform of the captains." Toshiro got a chill. He felt the bundle at his back.

"I...." he stopped trying. He was at a loss.

"Come with me."

"No."

"You don't have a choice." And suddenly he was surrounded, countless men all in black, and all appearing out of no where with flashstep. "Don't resist, Toshiro."

"Like hell." He had the sword off his back but she already engaged him. Their blades clanged, the black men were moving.

"Out of my way!!!" The voice thundered and he knew Kenpachi had arrived. Men when flying, then they were side by side, Soifon backed off.

"Zaraki!" she exclaimed, but he didn't wait. He was already barrelling through the crowd, Toshiro behind him. "Don't let them get away!"

There was no chance of escape. With flash step the soul reapers could cut them off at every turn. They stood back to back and prepared to fight.

"Son of a bitch!" Kenpachi cried and Toshiro felt his spiritual pressure fluctuate.

It doubled, then tripled, and kept going. He felt it like a weight on his limbs, and so did the other soul reapers.

"Control your spiritual pressure Zaraki or you'll destroy the whole area!" Soifon cried. But whatever was happening was beyond Kenpachi's control. Toshiro staggered beside him and the other soul reapers couldn't even get close to him.

"Scatter, Senbonezakura." thousands of pink blades shimmered around them, but still Kenpachi's spiritual pressure kept them at bay. The newcomer also wore a white robe and a blue scarf, his skin fair but his hair as black and Kenpachi's. More people arrived, some in the hioris, some in black kimonos. Ragiku was there, and the girl with pink hair beside another captain with a shining bald head. There was no way out.

"Ken..."

But the man didn't answer. He was lost in whatever was happening. Toshiro was having trouble breathing.

"Enough!" A voice rumbled. Then the weight of spiritual pressure became too much to bear. It wasn't Kenpachi's someone else, someone much stronger.

Toshrio fell to earth as if gravity had increased ten fold. He saw from the ground an old man, a wooden staff before him and a long white braided beared. His eyes were hardly open but it was undoubtably him who radiated this incredible energy. Kenpachi remained on his feet, it was a battle of wills and Toshiro was sure he was going to get crushed in between them.

"Kenpachi Zaraki! Stand down!"

The buildings around them began to disintegrate. All the regular people were fleeing.

Kanpachi never responded, just increased whatever that power was.

"Gha!" Toshiro gasped.

"Captain!" he heard Rangiku cry. "They're killing him!" There were a few more long moments where Toshiro thought his breath might stop altogether, then something happened. A man had appeared next to him, his long white hair flowing over his white hiori and the pressure receded. He gently lifted Toshiro into his arms and flashed away to a place behind the old man. He could breath again, but his whole body shook weakly, he couldn't move. With Toshiro clear, the old man unleashed everything he had.

Kenpachi dropped.

"No..." Toshiro whispered but his consciousness slipped away from him.


	6. Chapter 6

_They were standing in a long hall. The old man was at their head. The other twelve stood in two rows facing each other. Toshiro was staring at Kenpachi. Soifon was there too, and the white haired man. Then he noticed one with glasses. He had a kind smile but there was something about him Toshiro hated...._

Toshiro woke with a start. He was in a white room in a soft bed. He and Kenpachi had travelled all their lives, never stopping anywhere long enough to have a home. He had never slept in a bed before. He had also never not been able sense Kenpachi.

"Where is he?" he said to himself, leaping out bed and running to the door. It was locked of course, but he pressed his ear against it. He couldn't hear anything. "Damn soul reapers." He muttered. The door shifted and he leapt back. It slid open and a tall woman with a black braid down the front of her robes greeted him. He took a stance.

"Do you intend to fight me, Toshiro?" she said in a calm voice, entering the room. He looked at the open door behind her and tried to flash step past her. Nothing happened. He looked at her in shock but he still had ten years of fighting behind him. He made to simply trip her up and slip past but she was faster than him. He fell down, not even sure where she'd hit him, and then she was kneeling over him, whispering something. She withdrew and he stood but he felt sleepy. The door was shut, he was locked in with her but she made no move. He stumbled back to the bed and collapsed. He didn't pass out, he simply felt like all the energy had drained from him. He knew she was watching, he tried to look strong but knew he'd never get back up to his feet so instead he propped himself up against the wall and sat glaring at her.

"What did you do?"

"Its an advanced Kido spell. You know what Kido is, don't you?" He didn't answer. She advanced and sat on the edge of his bed.

"My name is Captian Unohana. We were friends, before you were taken by Aizen." Toshiro remained silent, pushed as far back against the wall as he could get. "I want to help you understand us, and yourself."

"Where is Kenpachi?"

"He's being treated nearby."

"I can't feel him. I can always feel him."

"It's the seki seki stone, dear. It blocks your spiritual power. It will actually help you heal."

He gave her a puzzled look.

"The reason your wounds haven't healed recently is because your body has been expending so much spiritual energy it doesn't have enough left to heal. When you learn to control your spiritual pressure you heal normally, even faster than normal. And you'll feel much stronger. For now, however, let me help."

"She gently pulled the dirty bandage away from his neck. It was plastered there by a combination of ointment, blood, dirt and sweat. She took a clean cloth and cleared away the dried blood and dirt and then let her kido fill the wound. It was an amazing sensation and with relief he felt the wound being to heal, finally. He relaxed enough for her to pull his shirt off and undo the bandages Kenpachi had tied so tightly around his ribs. He exhaled in pain when they loosened.

"Its okay." She guided him to a horizontal position on the bed. He still eyed her suspiciously but when the healing began he couldn't help but let the tension drain from him.

Her smile broadened.

"It must have been very uncomfortable."

"Hmm..." He suddenly felt his exhaustion increase.

"You've still lost a lot of blood over the past little while since you got the wound on your neck. And you're very dehydrated and malnourished. Go to sleep and when you wake up, I'm going to have all sorts of goodies for you." He felt bitter anger at her patronizing tones but sleep was winning out. His body relaxed as she continued her kido and nothing he could do would prevent sleep from coming. He closed his eyes and passed out.

* * *

Toshiro woke alone in the room. There was a red bag suspended above him with its contents slowly leaking into him through a narrow tube.

"Gha!" he yelled in disgust when he realized it was blood. He ripped it free of his arm.

"Toshiro!" it was Unohana again. She picked up the tube and hung it next to the bag.

"You were putting someone else's blood into me!" he cried horrified. His face turned pale and she grabbed the bucket just in time.

"Toshiro, it is a common practice, even in the Rukon districts. Have you never heard of it before?"

"Of course not, that's disgusting!" he said, wiping his mouth when he'd finished. She took the bucket from him and whispered a few words over his bleeding arm. The vein stopped leaking but he still shook with rage and disgust.

"I'm sorry you are so upset. I had quite a feast prepared. Maybe later then?" she said and handed him glass of water instead. As angry as he was he took it.

"What do you want with us?" he said at last.

"You were our friends, you were taken from us. We just want to help you get your memories back."

"Our memories? I remember everything, ever since I woke up in the soul society for the first time."

"I don't know what happened to you, but the day you remember was not the day you died."

"Of course it was."

"Then how do you explain your hiori? We found them with your things. You must have been wearing them when you arrived."

"So?"

"So, you know those are the captain's robes. You and Kenpachi were soul reaper captains."

He said nothing. The dreams haunted him.

"Do you remember Hyorinmaru?" his eyes narrowed but he stayed silent. "So you do. He is your zampakuto, one of the most powerful in centuries."

Toshiro looked into her eyes. "Where is he?"

"With the traitor Aizen, in Heuco Mundo."

"And Aizen is?"

"He is the one who took us. He attacked one day. Many of the captains were taken, including the two of you. We got most of them back. Some appeared in the Rukon district with no memories, like yourselves, but we found them easily. Some how, you two escaped on your own and wound up so far away we couldn't sense your spiritual pressure."

"I see."

"Do you believe me?" he looked away from her and rolled into the bed, his back to her. She lay her hand on his back for just a moment. "I'll bring you some food a little later then." Then he heard her walk to the door and leave. He shut his eyes. It had to be a lie, but somehow, he couldn't quite believe that.


	7. Chapter 7

They taught him how to control his spiritual pressure. They made him spend a whole week recovering in the white room– the novelty of the bed had quickly worn off. Still, they kept him isolated. Even in walking down the halls of the fourth division he received a number of startled looks from soul reapers who muttered his name and stared after him. He hated that they all thought they knew him. But he was happy to finally learn something about the powers that had been draining him so much.

Eventually, he was led to a small court yard in a quaint manor. It was the home of the white haired soul reaper that had rescued him.

"Hello again, Toshiro. My name is Captain Ukitake." He didn't try to remind Toshiro of his past and the boy was glad. "I'm going to teach you about spiritual pressure so you can control it."

"Where is Kenpachi?"

"He is with my good friend Captain Kyoriku. He has been getting the same instruction as you. It is very important that you both learn to control your powers. You know first hand how dangerous uncontrolled spirit energy can be."

Toshiro didn't answer. He remembered very clearly just how terrifying that power had been.

"I heard that you used flashstep. That is a form of using spirit energy. So is the ice you made."

"And the kido?"

"Yes, that too. But using it without control is very dangerous."

Toshiro remembered the charred corpses. It wasn't like he hadn't killed before, but in that instance, he had had no control over what happened. He could have killed Kenpachi.

"How about we start with simply being aware of your own spiritual pressure, okay? Come sit with me." he sat in the middle of the grassy yard and crossed his legs. Toshiro watched him for a moment, but the captain waited patiently. After a moment, the boy sat across from him. Toshiro couldn't imagine that the other guy had had much luck getting Kenpachi to do anything like this.

"Can you feel the power that comes from your body?" Ukitake asked. Toshiro tried but all he could sense was Kenpachi, only a few miles away. He didn't run, however, his spirit was calm, for now his friend was fine. He listened to Ukitake intently. In his years with Kenpachi he had never really had any sort of instruction before but here he learned quickly– incredibly quickly.

The more he learned the more he entertained the idea that maybe it he had learned it all before. By the end of the week he could control his spiritual energy without problem. Ukitake insisted they let him stay in his house so he got a room with no seki seki stone. With the training he received, he could finally wake up without being covered in snow. He liked his teacher. Ukitake was kind but it was his intelligence and calm composure that Toshiro admired. He didn't want to betray his trust, but on his first night in the house, he felt out for Kenpachi and left.

Kenpachi was not in a manor like Ukitake's, he was still at the healing house. He wasn't injured but it seemed an easy place to keep guard over him. Toshiro flash stepped past security– it was much easier for him to do since learning to control his spirit energy. Still, he was a bit clumsy, having had no real training. He landed in the room and skidded across the floor in his sock feet, only stopping when he hit the bed. He flipped up and landed directly on top of Kenpachi.

"Hey Ken." He said when he caught his breath.

"Nice entrance." Kenpachi sat up and Toshiro rolled off of him. He noticed the black eyepatch over his friend's face for the first time.

"What happened?" he nearly cried.

"Calm down, Kid." Kenpachi removed the eye patch and revealed his perfectly healthy eye. "It helps me keep my spiritual pressure down. Once I learn to control it though, it will be easy to bust out of here."

"Bust out..."

"Don't tell me they've gotten to you."

"No, of course not." he said unconvincingly, "but I think that I can learn a lot from them."

"Kid, who do you think you're fooling?"

"Tell me you don't think its strange. Why would they be lying? We woke up wearing those clothes, we had no memory, we were together...and now these dreams."

"Doesn't matter, its not who we are."

Toshiro was frustrated. "Maybe its who we could be."

"Since when did you ever want anything more than to find a good fight?"

"I don't know, since I found out there was more to life."

"Geeze they really got you playing into their fantasy."

"Shut up! You're just being stubborn. What about that girl with the pink hair? I saw the way you looked at her."

Kenpachi was suddenly very angry. "Listen kid, I don't remember these people! You don't either! I thought you'd figured out by now that we're the only people we can trust! So it doesn't matter if we have a few weird dreams and a couple a girls say they know us, okay?"

Toshiro clenched his teeth. "Fine." he shot back. "But it won't be easy getting out of here."

"No, but we'll do it. Just wait for me to get a handle on this spiritual pressure and then we'll bust out."

"Fine." He walked to the edge of the room and disappeared in a flash step. When he landed in the court yard he stumbled and fell, rolling on the grass. He lay where he landed.

"You're flash step still needs some work." Ukitake said from behind him. He stretched back his neck and looked up at the tall soul reaper.

"You gonna kick me out now?"

"No Toshiro. I don't want you sneaking off in the middle of the night however, you are not my prisoner." he paused. "So, you saw him then?"

Toshiro nodded.

"You understand, then, why we've kept you separated. I want you to have a chance to make up your mind for yourself. You don't have to do what Kenpachi says."

"How can I trust anyone over him?"

"You can trust yourself." the boy had no answer. He was conflicted and stared up at the stars as if they might offer some answer, but of course, they could not. "Come on." Ukitake walked into his field of vision and offered him a hand. "It's late. Time for bed."

The two returned to the manor and went to their rooms. Ukitake trusted Toshiro. After what he'd done, Toshiro expected to be locked up, but Ukitake had been calm and unconcerned. He rolled into this blankets and shut his eyes. It wasn't long before he drifted off.

"_Hitsugaya, we have to go now!"_ _The giant drug the boy-captain down the hall._

"_No, Hyorinmaru– I can't leave him!"_

"_This is our only chance." Toshiro's eyes were wild. He fought back against Zaraki even though one arms hung useless, bleeding, and several cuts and bruises covered his body. His eyes were raw and red and crazed. _

_Zaraki had found him in Aizen's main chamber, on his hands and knees screaming. Aizen hadn't touched the other captains, but he'd been torturing Hitsugaya for days. _

"_I'll kill you." he whispered and even Kenpachi Zaraki could never make a more menacing sound._

"_Listen, I don't know what Aizen did to you, and I don't know how you ended up alone in that room–"_

"_I stabbed him."_

_Zaraki paused in his struggle against the strangely powerful boy. _

"_You did what?"_

"_He made me. Over and over and over. She died. She died because of me. But then I did it. He never thought I would but I did it...."_

"_Is he dead?"_

"_No...he struck back." the boy's hand fell to his abdomen, Zaraki hadn't seen the blood against the black of his robes._

"_Shit, Hitsugaya–"_

"_Then it all started again...until you came. I don't know how many times, over and over and over, she died. And Hyorinmaru was gone."_

_He spoke as if to himself . His arm had gone limp in Zaraki's grasp, he was fading quickly._

"_You ain't got much time kid, and they'll figure out I'm gone soon. We gotta get out of here."_

_A moment of clarity passed over the boy. "The other captains...I can't sense them..."_

"_You what? What is going on?"_

"_Ichigo..." then his eyes glazed and he was gone. Zaraki picked up his body and slung it over a shoulder. He ran down the corridor to what was left of his cell guard. The arrancar hissed in pain as he was hauled to his feet._

"_If you want to live, open the gate." The arrancar obeyed, the cracks appeared and the soul reapers disappeared into black._

In the dark of the soul society two figures sat bolt up right in their beds. The dream rang through their heads, the details already slipping away but the emotions still strong.

"Toshiro what's wrong?" Ukitake burst into the boy's room, feeling the torrent of frightened spiritual pressure when he opened the door. In the dim moonlight he could see the form on the bed trembling and gasping for breath, his skin glistening with sweat. "Toshiro?" He said again, carefully sitting on the bed and grasping the boy's shoulders. Only at this touch did he look up at the captain. His eyes glittered with tears. Ukitake felt the spiritual pressure shift from fear to deep sorrow. The form in his arms shook more violently. "Hold on." He wrapped his arms around Toshiro. For a moment the small body tensed, he'd never been hugged before. Then he gave way to the overwhelming pain in his soul and sobbed into the arms of his mentor.

* * *

Kenpachi stood at the window of his room. The door open behind him and he half expected to see the kid again but it was the woman, Unohana.

"I felt you're spiritual pressure change. Are you alright?"

He considered her for a moment, but the dream was still too powerful. He knew, in the deepest part of him, that it had not been a dream at all, but a memory.

"What happened to us?" He said finally. She never changed her expression, she simply began.

"You were in Heuco Mundo. You went to fight Aizen and the arrancars in their own world. But Aizen came here. His power causes others to see illusions, powerful ones that can last forever. Toshiro fought him, but Aizen tricked him. He made him stab his friend, Momo Hinamori."

"She died?"

"No."

"But he thinks she did."

"He was taken before he could find out. You both were, along with many captains fighting Aizen and those who went to Heuco Mundo."

"Did he take you?"

"No. His illusions are weaker on me. I rescued Momo Hinamori, and the Head Captain sent Aizen back, but not before he had captured you all."

"Then what happened?"

"The other captains returned, less than a week later. We set up an escape plan and many made it back. Some however, did not recover their zampakutos and on returning, their memories were lost."

"That's what happened to us?"

"We can only assume, but you did not return with the other captains. When we went to rescue you, your cell was empty. Something happened, they had to leave right away."

"What happened to the kid?"

"Aizen particularly hated him. Before his betrayal, he had been Momo's captain. We do not know what happened in Heuco Mundo, Toshiro was never seen by the others again but they could feel his spiritual pressure with Aizen almost the entire time."

"He tortured him?"

"In one way or another. Most likely, he tried to break him using the memory of stabbing his own friend."

"He kept saying she died, over and over."

"Yes, we suspected Aizen might use an illusion to torment him."

"But then he said he stabbed him." Unohana's face changed a little.

"What is it?"

"Aizen was injured when we made the rescue. No one knew how. It was the only reason we were able to escape and keep him at bay."

"So he's still alive?"

"Yes, but he was badly injured by another, Ichigo Kurosaki, and has remained in Hueco Mundo for many years." She gazed on him for a moment. "What do you remember?"

"Not much. The kid was in rough shape, he didn't want to leave without his zampakuto but he was very confused. Then he said he couldn't feel the captains anymore. He passed out and I made this creature open a gate."

Unohana's calm face faltered. "No..." she whispered. "So we did leave you behind."

"What?"

"Our only defence was compromised, we were forced to leave. Some got separated but everyone made it back, eventually..."

He said nothing. He wasn't angry that they'd been left behind. If they'd been warriors than it was proper.

"Do you remember Aizen?"

"No."

"Good." The woman sighed and left the room in silence. Kenpachi returned to the window and stared that the moon. In the back of his mind he felt that inexplicable yearning– that cry that reached out to him across dimensions.


	8. Chapter 8

It was mid morning. Captain Unohana sat on Ukitake's floor sipping tea. He sat across from her, his eyes ringed black from lack of sleep.

"They had the same dream." Unohana concluded. Toshiro had not said much in the night but it seemed the same memory had returned to the two.

"Only once did I feel such pain." Ukitake said. "When Rukia Kuchki killed Kaien, it was the only time I felt such sorrow mixed with such self loathing. But Toshiro doesn't understand why, he doesn't remember what happened to Momo so he's having a lot of trouble with his emotions. Whatever happened, life really did start over for him ten years ago. He's not a captain, and last night, he was a child. What will happen if that memory returns?"

"We will have to hope that Captain Hitsugaya returns with it. He will be hurt by the memory, but as a captain he will be able to handle it. Where is he now?"

"Resting. He didn't calm down until early this morning."

"You should rest too, you look exhausted."

"I was worried, so I thought I should stay up and keep an eye on him."

"Please, get some rest Joshiro, I will watch him." He opened his mouth to protest but her eyes told him she wouldn't accept anything but a thank-you, so he rose, nodded his thanks and returned to his chamber. Unohana rose as well and walked to the boy's room. The door was open a crack, where Ukitake had been watching since dawn. She slid it the rest of the way and tiptoed to his side. She didn't need to touch him, instead she felt out with her spiritual power to assess his condition. He was in a deep and dreamless sleep, his whole body utterly exhausted from the pain he'd experienced that night.

_Aizen!_ She thought, careful to mask her rage. It subsided into a quiet sadness and she sat in the corner rocker, just watching her old friend breath. He was not the same person. He needed their help but, in the back of her mind, she knew they need him, and Zaraki, just as badly.

It was past noon when he woke. He did not move, he simply opened his eyes in silence. She felt his spiritual pressure shift and waited for him to sense her.

"What happened to me? Who died?" His voice was raspy.

"I think its best if you remember on your own."

He rolled over and faced her. His eyes were still blood shot, his face drawn with fatigue.

"Why does it feel like this?"

"I can't force your memories back and neither can you. You must be patient, then your feelings will make sense."

"Where is Captain Ukitake?"

"He is resting. He won't be able to tell you anything more than I. Would you like some breakfast?"

"I need to see Kenpachi."

"I think its best if you sort through this on your own."

He flung the bed sheets to one side and stood up.

"You gonna to stop me?" he said, remembering the last time he tried to flash step past her.

"No."

He disappeared.

* * *

Kenpachi and Kyoriku were in the squad eight training grounds. They were just about to break for lunch when a number of tiles on the roof of a nearby building shattered and rained down to earth. A second later the white haired boy appeared, striking the ground hard but landing on both feet.

"You really should learn to control that." Kyoriku said unphased.

"I need to talk to you." Toshiro said marching past the captain and up to his friend. "I felt your spiritual pressure last night. I know you remembered something too."

"I did."

"So do you believe them now?"

The man looked to Kyoriku then back to the kid. "Let's just say that I'm a little more convinced now."

"Tell me what you remember."

"Running. I remember running down halls and escaping."

"There's more."

"You were kind of out of it."

"But why? What happened?"

Kenpachi remembered Unohana's words. What had happened to the boy might be too much for him to handle if he remembered. He was not a liar, but the boy standing before him now was unstable, unprepared for such information. At the moment, he needed to be protected.

"I don't know." He said. The boy stared at him.

"You're lying."

"How could I know?" Kenpachi said back calmly. Toshiro eyed him longer, but there was no one he trusted more. His shoulders relaxed.

"Fine. But I want to know and they won't tell me." He glared at Kyoriku who stared back at him innocently.

Kenpachi said nothing. There was a slight shift in spiritual pressure and Ukitake was there.

"Ah Shunsui, lunch time is it?"

"I think it is." Said the other captain happily. The four of them went back to Ukitake's manor and had a large meal. Zaraki and Kyoriku had sake while Ukitake and Toshiro sipped tea.

No one knew what to say so they said nothing, letting the food distract them. Then Toshiro stiffened, he sensed a spiritual pressure he knew. Ukitkae also looked around just as a pink flash appeared in the window. The girl landed in the middle of the room, starring at Kenpachi.

"Yachiru, you're not supposed to be here!" Ukitake said standing.

"I've waited long enough." the girl said, a dark determination coming from her red eyes.

"Its time for you to remember, Kenny." Kenpachi stared at her in silence. Even standing she did not match his height in sitting.

"Yachiru, you should go now. We explained to you why this was necessary." Kyoriku stood now too.

"I've waited long enough. Now let Kenny go and I'll help him remember."

"We aren't holding him hostage Yachiru, but you know why we can't force this."

"No!" rage entered her voice. "I don't care about your plans, any of it! He'll remember if he just comes home. Baldy won't mind, and once he sees everything I'm sure he'll know me."

"Yachiru." Kenpachi spoke and the girl fell silent. "That's a good name."

"You gave it to me."

"I did?"

"You'll remember, I know you will."

"I'll let you know when I do."

Toshiro watched his old friend in silence. He'd never acted this way before. The girl broke into a teary smile.

"Okay, I'll be waiting." She flashed away.

The two captains were clearly taken aback by the man's gentle behaviour, but then Kyoriku smiled.

"I guess somethings can never change." he half laughed, slamming back another drink. Kenpachi said nothing but took up his own glass and tilted it back.


	9. Chapter 9

The incident with Yachiru reinforced the captains' decision to keep Kenpachi and Toshiro in isolation. Whatever they knew, they had decided that the only way for the two to regain their memories was with their zampakuto. The question was, how would they ever recover them from Heuco Mundo?

Toshiro felt Hyorinmaru call to him nightly. In the day though, Ukitake kept him busy learning all sorts of things. He enjoyed studying, and he learned eagerly and rapidly. Ukitake never showed him the violent skills– it seemed they still worried he might decide to take off some day– but he did teach him flash step, since he was using it anyway and causing a fair bit of damage in the process. But it was Kido Toshiro really wanted to learn. Ukitake only taught him the harmless spells, some healing and barrier spells he could practice. But he mastered them almost immediately and he wanted to know more.

His opportunity came quickly.

One afternoon Toshiro was reading under a tree in the courtyard when his teacher approached.

"What are you reading?"

"The history of the soul society."

"An ambitious choice."

"I'm already half way through."

"You really do love to learn."

"What's wrong?" his student asked perceptively.

"I have to go to join my squad today."

"Is something wrong?"

"Nothing serious, but they're embarking on a mission and I should be there to give them some guidance before they leave. I'll return tonight, help yourself to supper."

"Okay."

Ukitake stared down at him for a second later before leaving. Toshiro knew he was wondering what the boy would do with the freedom. Toshiro decided he would make sure to return before Ukitake so he didn't find out. He tuned into the captain's spirit until it was too distant to feel then he left. He knew the layout of the Seireitei from his book and quickly made his way to the main training grounds of the academy. He was in luck– Kido lessons were in session. He positioned himself on one of the rooves near the training yard and watched with excitement.

There was a lot to learn. Some of the spells were called Hado, they were offensive, more like what Toshiro had done that day he'd killed the thugs. He memorised the incantations, the numbers, everything. He longed to jump down and try himself. Then it was supper time and the classes filed away. He waited until it looked clear, then snuck down. There were rows of target dummies, some smoldering still, some torn, and others untouched where certain students had failed entirely to hit their mark.

"Hado 33!" he yelled.

He had seen the instructor do it without the incantation and wanted to try it himself. He felt the build up of energy and released. He didn't produce quite the right effect and the dummy disappeared in a ball of blue energy. It kept going and smashed the far wall to pieces.

"Oh shit." Toshiro braced himself to flash step but someone had already seen him. He wasn't a coward so he stood down and waited.

"You! What the hell are you doing?" It was an older student, followed by a number of others. Attracted by the commotion, some full fledged soul reapers appeared.

"Are you a civilian?" someone else asked, noticing that he was not wearing soul reaper clothes. He said nothing as they crowded toward him, but began to feel claustrophobic.

"You're just a kid, what are you doing here?"

"Who said that?" he challenged.

"Enough!" The students stiffened and stood back. A tall soul reaper in a white hiroi walked past them. He had tattoos all up his neck and over his eyebrows, reaching into crimson hair. He froze when he saw the boy in the middle of the crowd.

"Captain Hitsugaya!" he stammered. Shock rippled through the crowd. Toshiro knew he should have run from the start. The captain collected himself. "You aren't supposed to be here."

"I know."

"Where is Captain Ukitake?"

"He had to meet his squad."

"What were you doing?" He asked glancing back at the smoldering building.

"I tried Hado, but I skipped the incantation so I think it went wrong." Another wave of shock went through the crowd.

"You did _that_ without an incantation?" Renji muttered. Then in a louder, more authoritative voice he addressed the mob of students. "Okay, show's over, back to whatever you were doing." Reluctantly, the students filed away. He turned back to Toshiro. "You need to go back."

"I will, but show me the spell first."

"What spell?"

"Hado 33."

"No, time to go back."

"Fine, I'll just try again."

"No! Wait!" Toshiro smiled. Renji's shoulders slumped, he was defeated. "Fine, but its not really my strongest skill."

He raised his hand and spoke the words. A concentrated light manifested and he struck the mannequin with a controlled shot. Toshiro took a stance next to him and tried. His shot was perfect.

"I see. The spell gives you time to concentrate and manipulate the energy." The boy murmured.

"I guess, I don't really..."

"Now I can do the others..."

"No, you need to go home."

"I am."

"And not do any kido when you get there."

"I won't."

Renji gave an exasperated sigh and grabbed Toshiro's upper arm. "Come here. I don't trust you." They flash stepped away back to Ukitake's manor. Toshiro twisted out of Renji's grip and when to the kitchen.

"You can go now." he said.

"Man, you sure got rude. No way, I'm staying here until Ukitake gets back. He should have never left you on your own. He trusts you too much."

"Shut up. Who are you anyway?"

"I'm Renji Arabai."

"You're a captain, aren't you. What number are you." Renji's face tightened. "What?"

"I'm the captain of squad of ten." Toshiro's hand paused as it reached for an egg. He looked at Renji for a long moment then resumed his work, saying nothing.

"I didn't mean to replace you. We just thought you were...you know."

"Actually I don't know what you thought but it doesn't matter. I'm not the person you remember anymore. Anything he had died with him."

"Toshiro..."

"Its true. I lived for ten years not knowing about Captain Hitsugaya so why should I start trying to resurrect him now?"

"So you really don't remember anything."

"No."

"Hyorinmaru?"

Again, Toshiro's hand paused, mid stroke as he beat his eggs together in a small bowl. He sighed. "He's trapped in Heuco Mundo."

"I know, but if you could get him back, you could get your memories back."

"I told you, I'm not that person."

"But what about everyone who misses you? Who mourned you?"

"They mourned _him_. Its not that hard to understand, you must be slow."

"My lieutenant, she was your lieutenant. She's wanted to see you ever since you got back, its been torture for her to stay away."

"Rangiku. We met."

"And you felt nothing?"

"No."

"I don't believe you."

"Fine."

He poured the whipped eggs onto the frying pan and threw a few strips of cheese into the their midst. Renji watched him fold his omelette together and slid it onto a plate. He ate ignoring the presence of the other.

"What's going on?" Toshiro said after a bit.

"What do you mean?"

"Everyone is all stressed, I feel it." Renji cursed to himself. This kid didn't even have a zampakuto and he was still more in tune to spiritual pressure than him.

"Nothing." he lied.

"You suck at lying, Renji."

"Its _captain Abarai_." The boy choked on his food. Renji stood up alarmed. He saw the pained look in his face as he eventually swallowed and it dawned on Renji what he'd said. How many times had the little captain spoken those words to Momo, to Ichigo?

"I'm sorry." he said.

Toshiro ignored him. He was still contemplating whatever memory had struck him.

Renji stayed silent, he'd already done enough. Toshiro finished eventually and washed his dishes. He was still the neat and clean Captain Hitsugaya, and according to how fast he read his giant book, still the same workaholic, Renji thought. He watched him all night, the boy ignoring him, going about his routine as if he wasn't there. Then it was late, he was yawing. He seemed to feel some bit of competitiveness with Renji and he realized the boy wouldn't go to bed until he relented.

"Its pretty late. I'm about ready to fall asleep." he bluffed. The boy eyed him.

"Then go home."

"No, I want to talk to Ukitake when he gets back. I think I'll crash on the couch."

"Fine." Toshiro muttered. He watched the captain go into the foyer and stretch out on the couch. A few moments later he slipped silently into his own room.

* * *

Toshiro woke with the sun, waiting for Ukitake to come in and give him a lecture about his actions the day before. But no one came. He went out into the foyer and found Renji there, awake, sipping tea while he munched on a biscuit.

"Where is Captain Ukitake?" Toshiro asked wearily.

"Toshiro." the man looked around and Toshiro saw that Renji had dark circles under his eyes. He'd been up all night. Toshiro felt a wave of anxiety. Renji's face softened and he spoke calmly. "Captain Ukitake has a condition. Sometimes he gets sick..."

"Where is he?"

"Calm down. He strained himself a bit too much yesterday. He's with Captain Unohana in the healing house."

"I'm going."

"Wait. He needs rest." Toshiro paused. "Now you get yourself breakfast and I'll check with Captain Unohana to see when you can go visit."

"Okay." he said, suddenly meek. With a pang Renji realized that the boy had become very attached to Ukitake. He suddenly seemed as young as his appearance. He wished he could have Rangiku with him, or Rukia, he was shit at these things. He sent a messenger and waited. Toshiro wasn't gone long. He reappeared, impatient and anxious only ten minutes later.

"I still haven't heard back." Renji explained. Toshiro made a frustrated noise and returned to his room. When Renji looked in on his he saw he was buried in the next volume of the Soul Society history.

"Oh, this war." he muttered to himself. The messenger returned. He reported that Unohana said Toshiro could go that afternoon but he had more information. Ukitake, Rukia and the others had been on an important mission that night. They'd found a secret portal connecting their world to Heuco Mundo. Aizen was spying on them. It was in this search that Ukitake had fallen ill, and though it was really nothing to do with their on-going battle with Heuco Mundo he cursed Aizen.

"Who _is_ Aizen?" Toshiro had come up behind him silently.

"The enemy." he responded shortly. " You can see Ukitake after lunch." The boy exhaled deeply but didn't argue. There was a knock at the door. Renji opened and saw captain Kyoriku with relief. Behind him was Zaraki.

"Good morning Renji!"

"Captain Kyoriku, I'm glad to see you." he said with just a little too much relief. He tried no to stare at the ex-squad eleven captain who entered behind him.

"Kenpachi and I thought we'd stop by since you two were on your own." when the other two had moved away to the kitchen, Renji whispered a thanks to Kyoriku.

"A lot to handle is he?"

"A lot of attitude, even for the Hitsugaya we knew. I think Kenpachi's rubbed off on him a lot. But he didn't take the news well. He seems so..."

"Young."

"Yeah."

"How is Kenpachi?"

"He is exactly the man he was when he left, he just doesn't remember. Other than losing his memory, I don't think he was much affected by what happened ten years ago."

"Because he isn't closely connected to his zampakuto?"

"Exactly. Even Mayuri was very childlike when we finally found him. Its more than losing memories, its really as if life starts over."

"So he really is like a ten year old."

"In a way, but living with Zaraki caused him to grow up pretty quick."

"What were they doing all those years?" Renji murmurred.

"I would love to know." Kyoriku said half smiling as he watched the two most diametrically opposed captains in the Soul Society as they talked together intimately.

* * *

"You're really worried about this guy."

"So what if I am?" Toshiro shot back hostilely.

"Nothing. Its just not like you."

"What do you mean? We never stopped anywhere long enough for me to make any friends."

"I don't remember you ever getting upset when I got hurt."

"'Course I did! You were just unconscious."

"I'm touched."

"Shut up." Toshiro punched his friend in the leg; Kenpachi looked down at him.

"You've gotten stronger."

"'Course I have!" he said. "I've been training. What have you been doing?"

"I'll show you!"

Kenpachi took a stance and began building his spiritual pressure. Toshiro felt himself being pushed into the floor but didn't fall flat like last time. He laughed. They vaguely heard Renji and Shunsui yelling that they would bring down the house.

"This is awesome!" Toshiro yelled.

"Try to cut me!" Zaraki thundered.

"What?"

"Just do it!" Toshiro shrugged and grabbed a knife from the counter. Again they could hear strangled noised from the two captains who tired to make it to the kitchen but ignored them.

Toshiro swung the knife and slashed Kenpachi, wincing slightly. Nothing happened. He looked up impressed and Zaraki slacked off on his spiritual pressure.

"Whoa."

"I know eh?" Zarakai laughed.

"We could take down anyone in the whole world like this."

"Shortens up the fights this way though."

"True."

"Okay, you two. Enough playing around before you kill someone– like us." the two captains came into the devastated kitchen. Pots and plates and utensils lay everywhere, knocked down by the spiritual pressure and among them stood the boy holding the knife up to his friend.

"Fine." Toshiro replaced it in it drawer and began cleaning the kitchen.

* * *

The second they finished lunch Toshiro was ready to go. Kyoriku relented.

"Okay, but wait for us." They left together. The moment they arrived, Unohana instructed them one visitor at a time. Shunsui nodded and Toshiro shot into the room.

"Captain Ukitake?" he said, sitting on the stool next to the man's bed.

"Toshiro. You look upset. Were you worried about me?"

Toshiro said nothing but gave the slightest nod.

"Thank you." Ukitake said looking genuinely touched. His face was paler than normal but he was sitting upright. "I'm sorry Toshiro. I should have told you that I get sick sometimes. Its something I've had for many years, and though it looks bad now I will get better soon. I'm used to it."

"Okay." Toshiro said quietly. He had waited all morning but now he had nothing to say.

"How is your book?"

"I'm on the second volume now."

"Very good. What did you do yesterday?"

"I tried Kido." Toshiro admitted immediately out of some unexpected guilt. "I left and went to the training ground and watched them. Then I tried and blew up a wall. Renji caught me and took me home but he wasn't really that mad because he showed me how to do a Hado 33."

A number of emotions flashed through the sick man's face as Toshiro bluntly told the story but in the end his face split in a wide smile and he laughed. Captain Unohana came in. Toshiro knew it was time to go so he stood but he looked at Ukitake very seriously.

"I won't sneak out again, I'll wait until you get better."

"Thank you, Toshiro." It was the best apology he'd get from the boy. Toshiro left and Unohana smiled.

"He really admires you. You are very lucky."

Ukitake watched the door slide shut behind the boy and smiled, "I know."


	10. Chapter 10

It was a number of days before Ukitake could return. Toshiro felt better now that he understood. Renji stayed with him most the time, they still wanted to limit his exposure to captains and other soul reapers. He kept his promise not to leave but practised Kido in the courtyard. At times he was able to coax Renji into telling him some tricks but mostly he was shocked to find he could perform most spells flawlessly.

"Its muscle memory." Renji declared one day.

"What?"

"You don't rememeber but your body does."

"Is Hyorinmary muscle memory?"

"No. More like spiritual memory."

"Oh."

"You still dreaming about him?"

"Yeah."

The two had a standoffish relationship. Toshiro didn't dislike him perse but he was extremely competitive, constantly wanting to show him up in his knowledge of the Soul Society or in his skill at Kido.

It was a relief for the tattooed captain when Ukitake returned. Toshiro was very happy though he only showed a shadow of his true feelings.

For a day everything had returned to normal, but it was not to last.

* * *

It was early morning when Toshiro shot up in bed in a cold sweat. He was not the only one. Every Sou Reaper felt the dark presence.

"Toshiro!" Ukitake was screaming his name even before he reached his room. He leapt from his bed but Ukitake didn't stop running. He grabbed the boy's wrist and they were hurtling from the manor to the main hall.

"What is it?" Toshiro cried.

"Aizen is here!" Ukitake said, his voice strained. They were almost to the great hall when an orange light followed by a blast of heat erupted from the building. The two fell back hard onto stone steps.

"What happened?" Toshiro said helping his teacher to his feet.

"Toshiro, whatever you do, you must not look at Aizen's sword in shikai form. His power is illusion. We are all compromised. That explosino was the head captain, the enemy must have already gotten to him. You and Kenpachi are the only ones who have a chance of escaping."

"What do you mean?"

"Even I will fall prey to his illusions. I can't trust anything. You two lost your memory. Hopefully that means Aizen's power over you was also lost."

Another blast rocked them and the walls of the great hall crumbled. The head captain was standing at the middle of a blaze, lashing out at whatever soul reapers happened to be near. He called them arrancars.

"Head Captain no!' Ukitake cried desperately but no use. The Head Captain looked straight at him and still lashed out. They dodged just in time. They flash stepped a few hundred metres away and still the blaze was hot.

"Its been a while Ukitake, did you miss me?" the voice came from immediately behind them. Ukitake spun and engaged the enemy. Their blades clashed furiously.

"Captain Ukitake!" Toshiro's voice reached him, he broke from Aizen long enough to glance back at the boy. He was starring at him in horror.

"Toshiro, what is it?"

"What are you doing?"

"Its Aizen, I must fight him. Run!" He cried, trading a few more blows.

"No!"

"Run!"

"Its not Aizen!"

"Toshiro you don't remember him, just get out of here."

"No, its not Aizen! Its Captain Kyoriku!" Ukitake's blade paused and the enemy's did too.

"I thought your were going to kill me." Aizen said, but his voice sounded for all the world like Shunshui.

"No..."

"He's a dangerous bastard." Shunsui shifted into focus. Ukitake let his sword drop.

"I'm sorry."

"Never mind that, looks like you were right. They aren't affected." They turned back to Toshiro who still looked horrified.

"Toshiro, thank you."

"We can't fight this." Toshiro said, his voice full of fear. "How can we fight this? How can we know we aren't killing our friends?" Both captains felt a cold pit in their stomachs. Kyoriku had never been able to erase the image of the boy's face after he's stabbed Momo, nor that terrible scream.

"You can Toshiro. You will know." Ukitake said.

"But he could be me. He could turn into me and you wouldn't know."

"Then leave us. He could turn us against you too."

"What a good idea." A chill voice floated to them. Toshiro whipped around and saw a man in a long white robe with brown slicked back hair.

"Toshiro, do you see him?" Ukitake whispered.

"Yes, a man all in white."

"Run now."

"I can't."

"You can."

"Its not who I am."

"Do you miss Hyorinmaru?" The man said staring down at Toshiro. His stomach knotted hearing him speak the name.

"Where is he?"

"Oh, so you do remember him? But not me?" He twisted the blade in his hand and Ukitake and Kyoriku suddenly tensed behind him, bearing their weapons. They were yelling a name, _Byakuya_, and telling him to stop attacking. They told him to release the boy. Toshiro turned and looked at their faces. With a deep sadness, he knew they did not see him but this imagined attacker.

"Don't hurt Toshiro." Ukitkae said. "Its Aizen's trick!"

"No, _this _is his trick!" Toshiro said but they couldn't hear. Shunshui dove. Toshiro dodged but the blade split into two twin ones at the last second and he didn't have time to avoid this new attack. One blade sliced through his upper forearm. He grit his teeth and barely dodged the second.

"It doesn't matter, Histugaya. I don't need to trick you, with the whole Soul Society under my influence one of them will kill you sooner or later. Its just too bad that you don't remember what you did to her...oh well." Aizen disappeared. Toshiro looked after him but in his distraction felt another slice across one shoulder blade.

"Dammit."

* * *

Like _Hell _he was going to stay behind in a fight. Kenpachi stood in the squad four barracks, still staring after the spot where Kyoriku and Unohana had disappeared. A young soul reaper at his side tried to get him to move to another room, but he was already marching out the door. He marched his way across each barrack, not knowing where he was going but somehow sensing it was the right direction.

She was waiting for him.

"I know its not yours, but it will have to do." She said presenting him with a long, razor-sharp sword. Her own pink handles katana was strapped to her side.

"What's going on?"

"Aizen's here. He's using his powers on the soul reapers. Our squad is fighting but I waited for you."

"What is his power?'

"He tricks people using his sword. Don't look at it if you see him."

"I don't know how to find him, I'm not very good at all this spiritual stuff."

"I can!" She proclaimed as if she'd been waiting for him to say something to that effect.

"Alright." He looked down at her for a moment before offering his hand to her. "Here."

She looked at his hand but didn't need it. With practised skill she leapt onto his shoulder. He barely felt her weight.

"Okay, first thing, we find Toshiro."

"No problem!" The little lieutenant cried joyfully. "That way!" She said pointing straight ahead.

"Are you sure?"

"Of course I am!"

* * *

**_Let me know what you think! thanks for the reviews so far. there's not much left now, hope you like it!_**


	11. Chapter 11

"Captain Hitsugaya!" Toshiro flinched when he heard the voice, but he could not run. He slumped to the ground leaving red steaks on the wall beside him. Rankiku knelt beside him. He was still cringing.

"What is it?'

"You're all compromised." he whispered. Nearly every inch of him was covered in blood. From what she could tell most were superficial cuts that simply stained his clothes but two or three were deep and causing him a lot of pain. "Get back."

"I know you don't remember me..."

"Its not that."

"Then what?"

"Ukitake, Kyoriku, Renji...they didn't know what they were doing...I couldn't fight back, I'd hurt them..."

"They did this to you?"

He nodded. "And others. Every time I lost one soul reaper, another one appeared. Aizen did it. And he'll do it to you. Get away."

"Not yet." She pulled off her pink scarf and tore it into strips. She bandaged his deepest cuts as best she could. "There. Now I'll go." She stood but as he watched her she froze. He thought Aizen's illusion had gotten to her but then he felt it too. A man with white hair and a broad smile appeared. But it wasn't the only presence he felt.

"Hyorinmaru!"

"Gin!"

They spoke the words in the same instance and each glanced at the other. Toshiro stood up and took a stance beside Rangiku.

"What are you doing?" Rangkiu asked the newcomer.

"Well I have a bit of a predicament." his smiled deepened. "Aizen told me I had to give this back to Zaraki." he lifted a jagged sword, "but he left it up to me to decide what ta do with this one." he then showed Hyorinmaru.

"Why?"

"Ain't it simple Rangiku? I give this back to Zaraki, he remembers everything and Aizen controls him. He has no bankai so he's just as dangerous without his zampakuto. Giving it back ta him will actually make him weaker. The problem is, do I give Toshiro his sword back and watch him fall prey ta th'illusion, or do I watch him get cut ta pieces by the people who have been calling him friend?"

"You bastard!" Rangiku cried, unsheathing her sword.

"Oh Rangiku, don't do that."

She braced herself. He disappeared before her and reappeared right next to her. She swung. In an instant he was gone and she realized her mistake. Haineko just barely missed Toshiro's neck, glancing off his collar bone instead. He stumbled back and she dropped her sword in horror. It had happened that fast and Aizen wasn't even in her field of vision. Her knees gave way.

"I"m sorry. I'm so sorry." she sobbed. Toshiro sat where he fell with a hand over his collar bone. His eyes were torn between the sobbing lieutenant the smiling man who held his sword.

"Don't take it so hard, Rangiku. Besides, I've just had a better thought. If I give Toshiro back his sword, he'll get to remember everything. Wouldn't it be _wonderful _ta see him remember what he did ta her?"

Toshiro still did not move. _What had he done? Who had he killed?_

"Have ya seen her yet?" He asked Toshiro.

"Who?"

"Why Momo, of course."

"Shut up!" Rangiku said, picking up her sword again and standing. "You bastard! You shut up and go to hell!" She charged forward with her blade but his words hissed out to her.

"How can you be sure? How can you ever be sure? What if its _him?"_

She froze just inches from the enemy. "You can never know Rangiku, so you can never win unless your willing ta risk his life, or the life of any other soul reaper. _That's _what Aizen did ta him ya know. He replayed it over and over and then, he would give him his blade and tell him ta kill him. And every time Hitsugaya threw the blade away and watched it over and over again, because he couldn't risk it."

Rangiku shook from head to toe in absolute rage. But her hand was stayed. She was defeated.

"Well, I must be going. If you survive you'd make an excellent member of our new order Rangiku. Good luck." Then he turned to Toshiro. "I've made up my mind. Enjoy." he tossed the blade and it skittered across the ground stopping just inches from the boy. The man disappeared. Toshiro stared at the sword.

"Don't." Rangiku's voice was void of emotion. Gin had crushed her.

"I thought you wanted your Captain Hitsugaya back."

"I can't help you. No one but Kenpachi can help you and if he takes his zampakuto then you really will be alone. Don't take the sword, or Aizen will have you."

He felt a burning desire in his hear to pick up the zampakuto. It had called to him for ten years and now it was inches from him. His hand was almost moving on its own, he had to snatch it back.

"You don't have much chance of winning but you'll have none if you pick it up, even with your captain powers. Don't do it."

"Take it." he said stiffly. "Take Hyorinmaru and keep him from me until its over. I will kill this bastard and set you all free. And then I will get my memories back."

"Thank you." she stooped and picked up Hyorinmaru. It pained him to see the sword being taken away from him. She paused. Carefully she undid the sheath at her waist. "As a guarantee that I will defend Hyorinmaru with my life." and she tied the sheath across Toshiro's back and slid Haineko in. He gripped the handle at his back, still warm from her hands.

"And may Hyorinmaru protect you with his life." he said nodding to his own zampakuto in her hands. "I will bring your sword back to you, stained with Aizen's blood."

She felt the ripple of wind and he was gone.

* * *

"Kenny watch out!"

Kenpachi dove at the last second, a huge crash behind him. He turned and emerging from the dust was a pale faced, smiling man with white hair.

"He's one of them. Gin Ichimaru," the girl whispered in his ear.

"Kenpachi, I've brought your sword."

He held out the jagged blade and Kenpachi felt a strange tinge. Yachiru gasped.

"But you can't Kenny. If you remember, Aizen will get you too."

"Silly girl, ya gave the game away." Ichimaru dove forward, wielding the jagged sword. Kenpachi raised his substitute katanta but in a flurry of pink Ichimaru stopped before he met the giant. Yachiru met the blade with her own small one. Even Gin's smile was not infallible in such a moment.

"And here I thought you were all cute and no bite?"

"Kenney, you can't fight him. If your blade touched this one, or if he cuts you with it your memories will come back and he'll have you."

"I can't let you fight him alone."

"You have to!"

There was more clashing of swords but Yachiru was fast. Ten years she'd fought by herself, with Ikaku as a master, and not many had experience fighting an opponent of her size. She easily unbalanced him and got a cut on one calf. Gin jumped back.

"Impressive. But it won't be enough." he disappeared again and reappeared just a foot from Zaraki, barely stopped in time by Yachiru. Her body shook from the blow of their blades meeting and she stumbled back into Zaraki.

"That's enough!" Zaraki jumped forward, Yachiru couldn't stop him. Gin swung down but Zaraki caught his wrist. The sword was dangerously close and he felt a sort of ringing in his heart, as if the weapon were actually calling to him.

"Oh Zaraki, all brawn and no brain." Gin said and he opened his hand so that the blade fell straight at Zaraki.

In a flash, it disappeared from view. Gin's smile faded. Toshiro appeared out of flash step, the jagged blade in his hand. Kenpachi smiled and drew back his sword. Gin tried to break lose but that iron grip was on him. He cried out a hado spell in the same instant that Kanpachi's blade struck. His blade bit deep into Gin's side the spell faltered but was still enough to knock the giant back. Ichimaru tried to flash step away but his strength failed and he ended up on his hands and knees a few feet away.

"You were smarter than I thought, Hitsugaya. I guess that's why they called ya the boy genius. After ten years, I didn't think you could turn your back on your zampakuto."

Toshiro said nothing, this was Zaraki's kill. Kanpchi regained his feet, the flesh on his chest was burnt but he ignored it, marching forward purposefully.

"I don't know who you are, but I'm sure I'll appreciate this all the more when I get my memories back." He raised his sword.

There was a streak of pink, Ichimaru cried out, slumped to earth and was dead. Zaraki still hadn't let his sword fall. Yachiru wiped the blood from her blade. Zaraki and Toshiro looked at her shocked.

"You don't remember so you wouldn't have appreciated it enough. I have been waiting ten years to do that."

Neither man spoke but they understood. She may not have been with them in the past ten years but she lived by the same code.

"Take this." Toshiro held out Zaraki's zampakuto to Yachiru. "Keep it safe for him." She took it but looked sternly at him.

"I'm coming with you."

"No. Aizen will trick you."

"He won't."

"That's what everyone thought, and then they did this to me."

Kenpachi made his way over to the boy.

"You going to be alright?"

"It looks worse than it is. But we have to end this, now."

"Where'd you get the sword?"

"From someone I used to know. She's keeping Hyorinmaru for me."

"Can you sense Aizen?"

"He's hiding, but I can sense where there is the most chaos."

"Then lets go."

"I'm coming." Yachiru said pushing herself between them.

"No. Toshiro is right, you'll be compromised." She did not argue against Kenpachi. "When this is all over, I'll take up that sword." he said and she smiled lovingly at him.

Toshiro couldn't imagine what the two had in common but their connection was deep, even if Kenpachi did not remember her. He thought of Rangiku. She was also very different from himself, but still, there was something about her...

"Kid, let's get going."

He snapped back to reality. The girl had stepped back, Kenpachi was waiting for him to lead the way. "Right, let's go."


	12. Chapter 12

They found Aizen easily. For a moment they stood in shock, watching soul reapers hack at one another– master against student, captain against captain, friend against friend. And at the heart of it, unseen by them all, was Aizen.

"How does he do it?"

"His zampakuto. Something Captain Ukitake called shikai....as long as we don't see his shikai, it won't effect us."

"Then let's not give him the chance." They made their move. Kenpachi ran as fast as he could and Toshiro timed his flash step to arrive in the same instant. Aizen may not have had his power over them, but he was still a skilled warrior. He shot some sort of Hado at Kenpachi and engaged Toshiro with his sword. His strength reverberated through Haineko.

Toshiro saw Kenpachi fall back but he could not spare his attention.

"This is not your blade, Toshiro. I see your lieutenant is as loyal as ever." Aizen pushed him back and they traded blow for blow. "You haven't been idle in the past ten years I see." Toshiro maintained his silence. He hated those eyes, that smile– even if he didn't remember him. There was a grunt behind them and Kenpachi was back in the fight. His sword swung a little too close to Aizen and the traitor leapt free from the two.

"You are a dangerous pair. But you forget, I have the whole Soul Society at my command. You are out numbered."

He shot in to the air. Seconds later the ground trembled and a massive form loomed above them. Beneath it was a soul reaper captain, his face that of a fox.

"He's mine!" Kenpachi roared without questioning what he saw. Tosrhio let him go, another enemy was approaching. It was the dark haired man from earlier with the thousands of rose coloured blades. His scarf and Hiori were gone, is arms covered in black butterflies. Toshiro didn't understand but there was no time to question.

"You will die here and now, Gin Ichimaru." Toshiro didn't even bother trying to reason with him. He knew it was impossible. The shards hailed down on Toshiro. He tried to out run them but their master was better at flashstep than he. Byakuya intercepted him and slammed him to the ground while the fragments reformed into his blade.

"Goodbye, Gin."

"Wait," the boy gasped. He thought it was over then the earth trembled and he his attacker fell back. The massive shape Kenpachi had been fighting fell to earth and disappeared, the fox-faced captain falling to his knees. When the dust settled, Kenpachi was standing above Toshiro and his attacker.

"Need a hand?" He engaged Byakuya. Again the pink shards burst forth. Zaraki held his ground, Toshiro leapt to his shoulder. "What now?"

"Keep his attention, when he throws the blades your way, I'll strike."

"Okay."

They came like a tidal wave, Kenpachi stood his ground and Toshiro dove through their midst. Even with flash step the shards were fast. The path he raced through narrowed and he felt them tearing at his skin, a thousand invisible edges trying to tear him apart. He felt Kenpachi increase his spiritual pressure and then he was through. Byakuya had been blinded by his own power, his eyes widened at the last second but there was no time to recall his weapon. Toshiro stabbed him through the shoulder with Haineko. It was enough. He withdrew the blade and the man fell unconscious.

"Byakuya!" A girl with dark hair came running at Toshiro. "Ichimaru!" She screamed. But she did not charge him right away. She fell at the man's side, whom she called brother, applying pressure to his wound.

Toshrio turned away. Kepachi had sustained some injuries from the fight as well. Both felt hot blood tracing down their arms.

"Damn. He was a dangerous one." Kenpachi said when he reached his friend.

"No kidding."

"And her?"

"Hopefully, she won't attack."

"Rukia!" It was Renji, followed by Rangiku. Toshiro felt Hyroinmaru's presence at once.

"Rangiku, no, you have to stay away!"

"Gin!" She cried seeing him, but did not attack. It seemed she was afraid after what happened before. Rukia stood. Renji looked at her.

"Is he..."

"No, brother is still alive but he needs help."

"Take care of him, we'll handle this one."

"Kenpachi," Toshiro leapt back to his companion's shoulder. "That's Hyorinmaru. I'm going to try to freeze her with a kido but I can't let that sword touch me."

"Got it."

Toshiro stood straight, his balance perfected from much practice on the hulking shoulders. From here he had a perfect shot. He began the incantation for the binding spell. Renji dove forward but Zaraki countered. Toshiro finished, Rangiku was waiting for an opening, she didn't even seem to see him. He got off the shot and she fell with gold chains wrapped around her. Rukia jumped to her side.

"Where did that come from?" She cried.

"What did you do?" Renji demanded of Kenpachi. It took the two a moment to realize what happened.

"They can't see me." Toshiro said crouching back down to Zaraki's ear.

"How?'

"Think about it. Everyone so far has called me Gin–"

"And that fox guy calle me Aizen."

"Right! Aizen must have made a sort of generic illusion, it's the only way he could be controlling this many people."

"So what? That doesn't explain why they can't see you."

"Think about where I am. Now picture Gin and Aizen. He couldn't stand on his shoulder, it wouldn't make sense, so their brains have sort of defaulted. Now they just see one person, Aizen."

"Then you better hit them with that kido while you can."

"Right." Rukia had almost undone Rangiku's ties. Toshiro shot her first, then Renji. The moment of success did not last long.

"You ruined the fun." Aizen floated back to earth. "But oh wait, someone is coming. A _very _special guest."

A young girl with black hair wrapped under a white bonnet approached the scene. She first looked to the soul reapers bound on the ground, then to Aizen, her eyes never falling on Toshiro or Kenpachi.

"She can't see you." Aizen hissed to answer their question.

"Who is she?" Toshiro asked feeling his heart quicken.

"H-head Captain?" the girl murmured. He sword was still sheathed, her body untouched by the battle. "Is that really you?"

"Yes Momo." Aizen said, smiling.

"No!" Toshiro screamed but he was rooted by his emotions, he didn't know why he felt so strongly about this girl.

"What happened?"

"They were attacking each other, I had to restrain them."

"Captain Kutchki is badly wounded."

"Yes, but he will be okay." She hovered between him and the bodies, not knowing whom she should approach.

"Are you alright? You seem to have escaped harm."

"I'm sorry sir, but I can't fight. Its not that I believe in Aizen any more, its just, well, its like everyone has forgotten what happened." her hands clasped over her stomach as if some ancient pain affected her. "How can I fight anyone, even if they look exactly like him, knowing it could all be an illusion? But everyone has sort of..."

"Forgotten about that?"

"Yes..."

"Everyone except you?"

Her hands clenched even tighter over the spot.

"Yes."

"Because of what happened. Because of what Toshiro did?"

Her face darkened. "Yes." she choked. Toshiro's stomach knotted, he leapt from Kenpachi's shoulder.

"What are you doing kid?"

He knew what Aizen was doing but he couldn't help fall prey. He took a few paces closer and listened with bated breath.

"He hurt you so badly, you, his oldest friend. He did to you exactly what Aizen did barely a year earlier. He betrayed you and he nearly killed you."

The cold feeling in Toshiro's stomach was spreading. He stared at the girl, his heart racing. But the girl's face was changing.

"No. No Toshrio didn't mean it."

"You thought that about Aizen too, remember?"

"Sir, why would you want me to think that?"

"You have to face the truth, if you'd done that all along maybe you could have stopped all of this! If you'd known the men you loved were traitors how many lives could have been spared?"

"No! Shiro didn't mean it! He didn't mean it!" She cried hysterically. Toshiro was shaking with anger, and panic. Something was welling up inside him, ready to burst.

"Yes he did! He knew Aizen's power and still he swung that blade!"

"No!!!" she looked up and this time there was fire in her eyes, no tears. She reached for her sword hilt. Aizen already had his, she couldn't see, but she knew.

"You are not the Head Captain!"

"No, Momo, I'm not."

"Die Aizen!" The small girl charged. She would never win. Toshiro leapt forward swinging Haineko. Aizen knocked him aside first, then the girl, then met the force of Kenpachi's blade. He was fast– faster than Toshiro ever imagined he could be. He landed with a thud, inches from the girl. She didn't look at him but saw Kenpachi.

"Captain Zaraki?" Her voice was quiet but then her eyes lit up. "Then that must mean..." she scanned the area but did not see who she was looking for. For a moment, her eyes landed on him, he wanted her to see, but then they kept moving. "Toshiro...where are you?"

"I'm here."

But she never heard. Suddenly enraged, Toshiro jumped into the fight again. He and Kenpachi took their old tag team positions, back to back, though never in their lives had they had to use this technique against a single foe. Now it was the only way to fight that speed.

They were definitely on the defence. If one fell, the other would be exposed and go down too. It was the ultimate trust and their greatest strength. Kenpachi eventually got a bone shattering blow to Aizen's shoulder and soon after Toshiro got one to his leg.

For a split second Toshiro looked at the blood on Heineko's blade then Rangiku's bound form. He'd kept his promise.

"Time to end this game." Aizen said, panting. He held out his sword and Toshiro realized what he was about to do.

"Kenpachi don't look!" They turned away. Toshiro would have flash stepped but he would have left Kenpachi exposed and alone. A second later, he felt the blade rake across his back, tearing away Rangiku's bandgae and he fell to this hands and knees. Zaraki grunted beside him but did not fall. He heard the clashing of blades and knew Kenpachi had succeeded in engaging him again. Momo was hovering, unsure of herself.

Toshiro began to feel a heat. He saw the orange haze on the horizon and knew the real Head Captain was getting closer. Soon he saw black soot where everything in his path turned to ash. If he got much closed, Renji, Rangiku and the others would be burned up, and mabe he and Kenpachi too. It might be worth it if Aizen died, but then, he technically wouldn't win the fight, and that was just unacceptable.

Toshiro grit his teeth and pushed himself back up. This had to end now. Kenpachi now had several deep wounds, unable to counter the speed. Toshiro flash stepped in time to counter another blow at his friend's back and Kenpachi swung at just the right moment to get a good cut across Aizen's chest. He stumbled and Kenpachi struck with the other hand, smashing his calloused knuckles into that flawless face. Aizen sputtered blood. They heard a faint cry from behind them.

Toshiro turned, the girl was fine, but she was staring straight at him. Aizen's concentration had failed, she could now see him.

"T-Toshiro."

"I was trying to save him as a surprise." Aizen said, wiping the blood from his mouth. "I thought maybe I could give you a little revenge, make him look like me, have you stab him for a change, but when you said you wouldn't fight anyone, you ruined my plans." she couldn't respond, her eyes where fixed intently on Toshiro.

He felt that sensation in his gut again, he lost his focus.

"Kid!" Aizen's blade drove into his shoulder, he dropped Haineko and fell to his knees. Kenpachi kicked the enemy back, the sword jerking free of the boy's shoulder and spilling blood. There was no time for him to be concerned for his comrade, he kept hammering down on Aizen.

"Toshiro!" Momo cried, running to his side. The heat at their back was intensifying. The girl put pressure on his wound and he cried out.

"We have to stop him now!" he said through his grimace, feeling the sweat on the back of his neck.

"Captain Zaraki can do it."

"Not alone." He stood, supported by her. He clenched Haineko in his other hand and flash stepped forward. The battle would be determined in the next few seconds. All three were badly wounded now, Aizen was getting desperate. His illusion may have failed on Momo but clearly the Head Captain was still under his influence. Toshiro glanced back and saw Momo above the others, perhaps freeing them or attempting to protect them from the flames.

He couldn't spare the attention, Aizen's attacks were fierce. He blocked a hard blow and staggered. Aizen took the moment of weakness and struck him with the but of his sword. His jaw cracked, a tooth came lose and black spots danced before his eyes. He heard Aizen muffle a cry and knew Kenpachi got in a good strike but a second later he felt the ground shake and Kenpachi was beside him.

Toshiro rolled and countered Aizen's descending sword just in time. Aizen pressed down hard and Haineko sank lower and lower. Kenpachi swung forward. Aizen didn't counter, he smoothly disengaged from Toshiro and stabbed out. Kenpachi absorbed the blow as if he'd intended it. Aizen's zampakuto was deep inside his torso and he held it there, his own blade still pushing its way deeper into Aizen's stomach. Aizen gaped.

"Bastard..." he choked, blood trickling out his mouth. He raised his other hand and pointed it straight at Kenpachi's face.

"Hado Thirty–" Haineko sliced across his palm. The spell rebounded, sending both him and Toshiro flying.

Aizen slid free of Kenpachi's blade and his own ripped out the giant's side, sending him to earth. Toshiro felt out but had dropped Haineko next to Kenpachi. Aizen smiled at him, crazed. The flames were now visible and they didn't just come from one direction, they were everywhere, surrounding them and slowly closing in on them. But Now Aizen staggered up and hovered over Toshiro.

"Time for me to make my exit, but before I go, I must make sure you can never bother me again."

Toshiro had nothing. His head was still spinning, he had no sword and he no time for Kido. Aizen lifted his sword.

"You're wide open, Soske Aizen." Toshiro could only see Aizen's stricken face and arm frozen upward, the rest of him was blocked by the black robes and white bonnet of Momo Hinamori.

The girl withdrew her sword from Aizen's heart with a cruel twist that did not suit her gentle nature. He dropped, gasping. His eyes met Toshiro's and he laughed.

"Can you believe it was her? After everything it was _her_? Oh well, you'll both be going with me..."

It was too late. The all-consuming flames were upon them.

"Toshiro." Momo said and for the first time he noticed the second blade in her arms. Hyorinmaru.

"You are the only one who has the power to stop the Head Captian."

"I don't understand."

"You will as soon as you take up this sword." he felt his hair begin to singe.

"Okay." he reached for it but she withdrew for a second.

"Remember, I forgive you."

And she thrust it into his hand at the same moment pulling him into her arms.

_Aizen's blood soaked body hung on his sword, but the image was shifting, fading into something else. Momo stared at him from the end of his blade. A wrenching pain tore through his heart. He slid the blade free and cradled her in his arms. _

"_Toshiro...why?" His face creased with agony, an uncontrollable rage and suffering built up inside his soul._

"_NOOOOOOO!!!" _

_Blinded by hate he set her down and dove. They were screaming his name but he didn't care. Hot pain flooded him, he felt an ice wing shatter. The others were falling around him. Another strike, his right arm hung useless and he and Hyorinmaryu were crashing to earth._

_There was a long battle in the sky. Toshiro had lost consciousness for a while but when he came to he saw the boy Ichigo on the ground. He looked around in confusion, and he knew Aizen had revealed his shikai to him. Their only hope was lost. The ex-soul reaper, Urahara, appeared. He came just in time to rescue the boy but vanished just as quickly. Then Aizen was overtop of Toshiro, had his hand on his collar, then he could see nothing. The illusion was pure darkness, Aizen could collect them one by one and take them back...._

* * *

_He saw her face again and again, blood trickling down her chin, tears in her eyes, her weight on the end of his sword, then that question. _Why?

_Over and over and over. She died. _

_Days he'd watched it. The illusion shattered. Aizen hauled him to his feet and shoved Hyorinmaru into his hand._

"_Kill me."_

_His hands trembled. Momo's blood still stained the blade. _

"_Kill me!"_

_His knees threatened to give out. The other captains were here, it could be them, it could be Rangiku, it could be anyone. How could he ever know?_

"_You can't know, Toshiro. You can never know, ever again, as long as I'm alive, and how can you ever kill me unless you're willing to kill one of them. But then, you were willing to kill her."_

"_No..."_

"_Yes. Now kill me!"_

"_No..." he dropped his zampakuto. Aizen smiled and it began again._

"_Toshiro why?"_

"_Momo forgive me..."_

_Over and over and over. She died._

An unearthly scream ripped its way out of his soul but she was there, her arms around

him, alive. He was sobbing into her, the air thin, mostly smoke now, the heat unbearable.

_Master._

"Bankai!" The ice formed around him but Momo didn't let him go. He couldn't have moved if he wanted to. The ice dragons shot forth, one after another, building a wall against the flames. The heat receded but he had to maintain a steady stream to ward of the flames.

"Momo..." he sobbed. "I'm sorry,"

"I've already forgiven you."

He sank into her.

"Hold on just a little longer Toshiro." He felt his energy draining, his entire being pouring into the ice wall that protected them, Kenpachi and the others. Aizen wheezed beside them, determined to maintain his hold over the Head Captain. They were stuck. Toshiro was immobilized by the power drain and if Momo let go of him he would surely give in to exhaustion. It was a battle of wills: who could hold on the longest.

Water began to pour down on them, the ice was melting. He tried to give more power to the shield but it was fading fast. Every second he didn't know if he could make it to the next but then he heard it: the final gasp, the final exhalation of Aizen's poison breath, and the flames disappeared. The ice turned to water, Toshiro's Bankai faded. The only thing keeping him up was Momo. He dropped Hyorinmaru and used the last of his strength to wrap his arms around Momo. He sunk his face into her shoulder and wept. Then, he was still.


	13. Chapter 13

"Yo Kid." Toshiro sat up in his bed. He'd been awake for about an hour now and Kenpachi was the first person he'd seen other than Captain Unohana.

"Hello Kenpachi."

"So you got your memories back did you?"

"Yeah."

"And?"

"And what?"

"Was it worth it?"

He considered for a moment. The pain in his heart was great but Momo's words of forgiveness made it bearable.

"Yes."

Kenpachi shifted uneasily. His torso was still heavily bandaged and Toshiro guessed he wasn't supposed to be moving around yet.

"You haven't picked up you zampakuto yet?"

"No."

"You wanted to see how I handled it." It wasn't a question, Toshiro knew him well.

The big man grunted but said nothing. Toshiro looked up at him, seeing both the squad eleven captain and his old friend all rolled into one.

"You're exactly the same. You have nothing to worry about, nothing will change– except, you'll remember her."

Kenpachi was quite. "Who is she?"

"You'll find out. You _are _going to pick up your sword aren't you?"

"Well, it seems to have done the trick for you."

"Yeah. Does it bother you?"

"Why should it?"

"Because it was just the two of us for so long, and now there are all these other people to be concerned with."

"And, what _is _it like?"

"Its like waking up."

"So the past ten years, you don't think they were real?"

Toshiro straightened himself, wincing as pain shot through his shoulder. "Don't get me wrong, they were real, and that person is still alive in me, but that aching is gone. That feeling that there was something more..."

"It always bothered you the most."

"Until we met Yachiru, then you knew too, didn't you."

"Maybe."

"Are you mad that I took my memories back?"

"Well I'm glad you didn't let us all burn to death."

"You know what I mean."

The man sighed. "No. And I'm tired of everyone else thinking they know me better than I know myself."

"Then you've decided. When will you do it?"

"No point in waiting."

"Want me to come?"

"Nah, you stay put, doesn't look like you could handle it."

"Shut up."

"See you on the other side, I guess."

"Good luck."

Kenpachi left and Toshiro knew that the next time he saw him everything would be different. It already was for him, he didn't know how Zaraki would see him once he got his memories back. He sunk back into his bed, his eyes already drooping with fatigue. He hung on just long enough to feel the shift in spiritual power and he knew it was done.

* * *

Kenpachi walked down the hall to the squad eleven office. Yachiru was alone, waiting for him. She looked up as him very seriously and held out the sword. He was ready. He had no memories of the girl but his heart knew her, and that alone made him want to have his memories restored.

Slowly he stretched out his hand. The girl bit her lip, the sword trembled in her hands. She was nervous, excited. She'd waited ten years, after all. No more hesitation. He gripped the handle and felt the rush of memories– more than a century's worth– and almost all of those years spent with her. Her face, small and round, her eyes bright and shining, even when she touched the blood on the end of his blade. He remembered her laugh, her anger, her commanding tone and her overconfidence in her sense of direction. The nameless blade seemed to sigh in relief and that constant nagging at the back of his mind was finally gone.

"Yachiru...you've changed." he said at last. The girl was trembling from head to toe, her face a mixture of emotions and finally she shot into the air and had her arms around his neck.

"Oh Kenny!" she cried. "You're back! You're back and now we can be together forever!"

"Thank-you, Yachiru, for waiting."

He wrapped his massive arms around her and that smile that once never left her face returned.

* * *

_**One month later**_

"Yo Ken, you ready for this?"

The newly reassigned captains ran side by side toward the gate to the world of the living.

"You kidding me? I live for this shit."

They dove through the black tunnel.

"So Ikkaku didn't care about you taking the squad back?"

"Are you kidding? That guy only cares about finding a decent fight."

"I can respect that."

"And Abarai?"

"He said he never really wanted the job anyway. I think he still has some unfinished business with Kuchki."

"Which one?"

They both laughed. The black tunnel began to fade to light; they emerged into the bright sunlight on the other side.

"Its Ichigo's spiritual pressure." Toshiro announced at once.

"Does he know yet?"

"I don't think so. I heard he's been out of touch for a while, something about trying to finally finish a university degree."

"He's in for quite a surprise then." The giant chuckled.

"Yeah, should be good."

They ran through the city searching out the dark spiritual power. They found it quickly, another rogue arrancar from Hueco Mundo, lost without its leader and wreaking havoc on the world of the living.

He was massive, already in his final form. And before him was a young man, his orange hair still short and spiking out in all directions. Not much had changed: his shoulders were a little broader, his body a little stockier, but he was the same Ichigo they'd know as a boy. He fought with determination but the arrancar had badly wounded one leg and he was off balance.

"Need a hand, kid?" Zaraki thundered. Even with the hideous monster before him, the young man turned, his body stiff with shock. He saw the pair, standing side by side, their zampakuto's drawn and ready for battle.

"Z-Zaraki? Toshiro? No way!" The monster attacked, Toshiro leapt forward and blocked a would-be fatal blow to Kurosaki. When he'd pushed the monster back, he looked casually over his shoulder.

"Its not Toshiro, its _Captain Hitsugaya_." The man only stammered, while Toshiro absorbed another blow. He felt a thud behind him and glanced back. A second arrancar had landed also in its final form.

"Not another one." Ichigo sputtered.

"No problem." Zaraki said, jumping at the beast. His blade hewed off half its bone cheek and it reeled back, striking him with a clawed hand. At the same moment, Toshiro was hurled back by a blow from his opponent and the two crashed together in the middle, right in front of Ichigo.

"Time to get serious." Zaraki rumbled.

"You better get down, Ichigo."

The young man felt the spiritual pressure of the two captain increase exponentially and he hardly had a choice but to crouch low next to the two. On one side, the enemy was paralyzed by the sheer weight of spiritual pressure. On the other side, ice began to congeal around the arrancar's body, literally freezing it in place.

From their position back to back, the two captains leapt at their opponents. Ichigo watched them swing down in perfect unison, each beast splitting in half and shattering into a million spiritual particles. The two warriors sheathed their blade with satisfaction.

"Damn, I thought that was going to be entertaining." Zarakai said, spitting on the ground as he sauntered over to Ichigo who staggered to his feet on his injured leg.

"Yeah, tell me about it. I figured our first trip to the world of the living in ten years would be a bit more exciting." Toshiro wordlessly put his hands on the young man's thigh and began a kido spell. Ichigo stared down at him in utter shock.

"Yo Ichigo, how ya been?" Zaraki clapped him on the shoulder and the man staggered.

"I thought you were both dead." He stammered finally.

"Yeah, so we've heard." Toshiro said straightening up, Ichigo's leg healed.

"What happened?"

"I'm sure Rukia will fill you in some time. Any more arrancars around?" Kenpachi asked, gazing at the sky hopefully.

"No. What's with them? They've been going crazy the last month."

"Seriously, no one told you?" Toshiro said, remembering how deeply entrenched in soul reaper affairs the boy used to be.

He awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck.

"Well, I asked them to lay off on me for a while so I could finish my undergrad. I guess they took it pretty serious. So what happened?"

"Aizen's dead." Toshiro said cooly.

"What?"

"Momo finished him."

"What!"

"After we helped, of course." Kenpachi interjected.

"I helped too!" came an indignant and high pitched voice. Yachiru came bouncing toward them, eventually landing on Zaraki's shoulder and followed by Rangiku.

"Captain, why didn't you wait for me?"

"You were slow." he said, trying to sound casual.

"Well I guess you didn't need our help anyway." She said, looking at the still disintegrating particles. "Still, you didn't have to rush off quite so fast."

"I haven't been to the world of the living in a long time."

"Ooo, so you were excited!"

"Shut up." but she only laughed at him. He scowled but made no further argument.

"Rangiku, what happened? They won't tell me."

"Oh, Rukia still hasn't told you?"

"She promised not to trouble me with this stuff."

"Well in that case..."

"Rangiku, please tell me!"

"You'll just have to wait, we have to get back to the Soul Society. I'll tell Rukia to come visit, that is, if you aren't to busy for soul reaper business."

"Hey wait, I didn't mean–" But Rangiku just winked and then she dashed away, followed Zaraki and his small lieutenant. Toshiro only lingered for a second.

"Its good to see you again, Ichigo."

"You too."

And he was gone as well.

Ichigo sighed deep, staring after them and sheathing Zangetsu. "Soul Reapers..."

* * *

"I heard your mission went well."

Toshiro looked up from his desk. Momo stood at the door to the office. She looked at Rangiku on the couch. "Is she sleeping?"

"Yeah. I've given up on trying to keep her awake."

"She really missed you."

"I know."

"I did too." Toshiro felt that familiar pang of guilt. He'd talked with Momo several times but it was hard to breach the subject. Now, riding on the success of his mission, he decided to try again.

"Momo, how can you forgive me?"

"Toshiro..." he didn't correct her– he could never correct her again. "I know for you its all still fresh, but its been ten years. I forgave you almost immediately. I know what happened, I know you didn't mean it, it's ancient history."

"Except it isn't." he said, nearly choking on the words. She came to his side, put and hand on his shoulder and he looked up at her. She was not the same girl he'd left behind. She was stronger, resilient and determined. He would have been proud had he not known what had forced her to become that way.

"You remember how I attacked you that night, when I thought you killed Aizen?" He nodded. "You remember how you forgave me? That's how I forgave you."

"But its not the same."

"It is. Aizen tricked us both. Don't let him win now by hanging on to you guilt."

Suddenly he stood and threw his arms around her. "I will always protect you."

"I know."

He withdrew and re-composed himself. He was the captain again.

"I hear congratulations are in order."

"Yes. The Head Captain wanted to recognize my part in taking down Aizen."

"Acclamations from the Head Captain are rare, I'm very proud of you."

"Thank you, captain Hitsugaya." she paused, her smile faded a little. "Captain Hitsugaya, you never said what you did those ten years. I know its not my place, but maybe sometime, could you–"

"Momo." she stopped talking and watched him carefully, his expression unreadable. "I wouldn't mind taking a walk in our old district, where we used to live together. Maybe tomorrow we could–

"Alright."

"Good."

A familiar understanding passed between the two. Momo bowed slightly and left. The moment the door shut Rangiku sat up.

"Can I come? I want to know too."

"I already told you all there is to know."

"I guess...you just want to be alone with Momo, don't you?"

"Shut up! You know how I feel about her!"

Rangiku almost made a joke but stopped herself. She knew what he meant, the two were practically siblings and he was working hard to rebuild the relationship he once had with lieutenant Hinamori. She seemed older now, wiser, and though he wanted to be her protector, she was more like the older sibling than he. A stroll down memory lane would be good for them both.

"Fine, I won't bother you."

"You need to get caught up on paper work anyway. Between you and Abarai in the last ten years, there's been a lot of slack reports."

"What, how do you know?"

"How do I know, what do you think I've been doing this last month?"

"What, you've been reading all the reports from the last ten years?"

"Are you kidding? They're like a page each, it doesn't take very long. No, for the past month I've been trying to fill in the blanks you two left."

"Oh." she said airily.

The pencil in his grip snapped and he had to fight to swallow his frustration.

"Captain Hitsugaya." He broke from his trance of rage and looked to the doorway.

"Captain Ukitake." he abandoned his paperwork immediately.

"Could I have a moment?'

"Of course." Toshiro followed after the other and Ragiku watched them leave from the couch. Her captain had changed. In many ways he was the same but those ten years had changed him. When he returned to the soul society, he had been a child, and Ukitake had taken on that parental role. It didn't matter how much Toshiro fought to be seen as an adult, he couldn't escape that relationship that had been forged in the weeks he'd spent with Captain Ukitiake.

"Its been a busy few weeks, and I haven't gotten the chance to talk to you." Ukitke began.

"I know. I heard you were in the healing house when I was. Are you alright?"

"Nothing much, just a few cuts. And you? I heard Aizen stabbed you in the shoulder."

Toshiro rotated the joint. It didn't pain him but got stiff sometimes, like the last little reminder of all the damage Aizen had caused.

"I'm fine. I just got back from the world of the living."

"Yes I heard you and Captain Zaraki had great success."

"Yes, it was no problem."

They had walked to the end of the squad ten grounds and stared in at squad eleven. There was a skirmish in the yard, as usual. Zaraki watched on as Ikkaku took on the new recruits.

"We never got a chance to discuss things." Ukitake sighed.

"Yes, I've been meaning to thank you for all you did for me."

"You're welcome but its not that. I just wanted to know, how do you feel, now that everything is returned to normal?"

"You mean how have the last ten years affected me? Its strange. Those years are still clear but at the same time my memories from being a soul reaper just before Aizen took me are razor sharp, like they just happened. In a way, its good, I don't think I'd fit in very well otherwise."

"But you've changed."

"Those years with Zaraki...I was happy, life was simple. I can never forget that time. It will always influence me."

"When I first met you again, after all that had happened, I thought you were very different. You admired him, didn't you? Looked up to him like a mentor?"

Toshiro only nodded, still staring at Kenpachi, the small lieutenant omnipresent on his shoulder.

"I did."

"You were so blood thirsty, just like him. You are you're old self again, but some of Captain Zaraki's influence has stuck with you." Toshiro didn't say anything but he knew it to be true. "Well, I must get back to the squad. I hope you will come join me for supper at the manor some time."

"I will." Ukitake left him. Ikkaku finished with the last recruits and they limped away in the direction of squad four.

The yard was empty, except for Kenpachi and his lieutenant. Toshiro met his eyes across the field. For a long moment, they gazed at one another. A quiet understanding passed between them. They would never be the same soul reapers they had been ten years ago; they would never be those two lone warriors who had crossed the world together– they were something different, something better, something stronger.

Toshiro broke his gaze, and turned back to his squad.

This is where he belonged. There was a lot of work to do.

~END~

* * *

_**Sorry for those of you who don't like long conclusions but I really enjoyed the relationship between Zaraki and Hitsugaya and their relationships with everyone else while they didn't have their memories so I wanted to do justice to everyone and give some closure on all their different relationships. I also felt I had to include Ichigo, even if for so brief a passage– he's so integral to the original Aizen battle (in the anime/manga) that he deserved some mention. Anyway, this was a blast to write, endings are the hardest and I'd love to hear what you think. Thanks for reading!**_


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